


Ridin' the Storm Out

by Sesshomaru_gal



Category: Supernatural RPF
Genre: AO3 1 Million, Abused Jensen Ackles, Abusive Tom Welling, Asshole Jared Padalecki, Brief Jensen Ackles/Jared Padalecki - Freeform, Domestic Violence, Hurt Jensen Ackles, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-02-16
Updated: 2017-03-06
Packaged: 2018-01-12 15:34:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 16
Words: 34,606
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1190430
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sesshomaru_gal/pseuds/Sesshomaru_gal
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jensen hasn't had the best of luck in love so when his best friend Christian wants to set him up on a blind date with his buddy Jared, he decides to go ahead and give it a shot. When the night ends up a disaster he falls right back into the arms of his abusive ex-boyfriend. Will they be able to get through to Jensen before it's too late? Will he even want them to? You'll have to read it to find out!</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [One More Shot](https://archiveofourown.org/external_works/36111) by sammyndeansgrl1. 



> I was inspired to write this story after reading "One More Shot" by sammyndeansgrl1 posted at livejournal.com. There are only a few similarities in the beginning of the fics. After the initial introduction, my story actually branches off in a completely different direction. "One More Shot" is a wonderful fic written by an awesome author and I highly recommend everyone to go there to read it and give her some love!

Jensen sits nervously in the booth waiting for his date to arrive. It was agreed that they would meet at Willy Jaks at 6:30 pm but Jensen was so anxious that he showed fifteen minutes early. He’s wearing a nice green button down and black jeans, nice without being too formal. He hasn’t been on a first date since he first met his ex. He didn’t really want to go out but Christian insisted that it had been too long. Christian’s buddy has a friend that they thought would be a good fit for Jensen and set the two up on a blind date. Jensen checks his watch as the waitress refills his water and watches the door. His date should be here any minute. He doesn’t know much about the guy aside from his name and that he is apparently Polish. After a half hour goes by he decides to order a real drink and has the waitress bring him a beer. He spends his time checking his watch and checking the door. Four beers later find him moved from the booth to the bar in the back of the restaurant. By the time 10:00 pm rolls around he is on his way to getting drunk. He looks up when he hears heavy footsteps approach him. He sees a giant of a man with shaggy dark brown hair and hazel eyes. The man has an awkward grin when he starts to speak.

“Hi! You must be Jensen. I’m so sorry I’m late!”

Jensen just looks at the hand that is being thrust at him before turning a hard gaze up to the man’s eyes.

“So, you’re Jared. I’ve been sitting here for hours, but you’re sorry. You stood me up, but you’re sorry. You didn’t even have the decency to call and just cancel?!”

Jared drops his hand as his face falls.

“I’m sorry, I was held up at work. I didn’t want to cancel; I’ve been looking forward to this. Especially after the day I’ve had.”

“Six thirty. That was the agreed time and you couldn’t be bothered enough to show. Oh, but that’s okay because work held you up!”

At this point Jared is starting to get upset. He doesn’t understand why this guy is being such a dick.

“Yeah! Work held me up! I’m a doctor and I’m sorry if helping people that are sick or injured make me late for a night on the town, but I like to think that makes me a better doctor!”

“Oh that’s rich! You stand me up but it’s my fault!”

“I didn’t stand you up! I’m here!”

“Anything after forty five minutes is being stood up, asshole!”

“I’m the asshole?! I save lives for a living, what the hell do you do?!”

Jensen finishes off his beer and throws a few bills on the bar. He stands up and pulls on his jacket before turning to Jared.

“You know what? Fuck you!”

He brushes passed Jared and makes his way towards the door. Jared is pissed and pulls out his phone. He quickly dials and waits for the other end to pick up. He curses when it goes to voicemail.

“Damn it, Chad! I just wanted to say thanks for wasting my time and setting me up with a total asshole! Obviously your buddy wouldn’t know a good guy if he walked up and kissed him!”

He ends the call and decides to just call it a night and pretend this whole day never happened.

 

 

* * *

 

_“Do you think he just didn’t like what he saw and left?”_

Jensen is so upset he is really close to breaking his phone.

“Gee, thanks a lot Chris! So what, you’re saying he was really on time but was so disappointed that he had to leave for several hours just to work up the nerve to spend one fucking night with me?! It’s nice to know you’re such a good friend!”

_“Well, I don’t know what the hell to say! Maybe you’re overreacting. I mean, the guy is a doctor. He was probably telling the truth.”_

“Then why didn’t he just call? We could have just rescheduled the whole thing.”

_“Maybe he didn’t have time.”_

“In all of those hours that I sat there, he couldn’t find five minutes to call or even have a receptionist or someone that could get a hold of me? All this proves is that he was probably only going along with it because your douche of a friend told him to.”

_“Hey, now I know you’re pissed but don’t drag Chad into this. He didn’t stand you up.”_

“Whatever, Chris. I gotta go.”

Jensen hangs up before Christian can say anymore and suddenly slams into somebody hard enough to lose his balance. Strong hands reach out and grab him.

“Whoa buddy, what’s your rush?”

Jensen looks up to apologize but the words get stuck in his throat when he sees who is standing in front of him.

“Tom? What the hell are you doing here?”

Tom smiles big and has nothing but pure excitement in his eyes.

“Jenny?! Hey, man! What’s going on?”

Jensen looks around a second before answering.

“Nothing. Just getting ready to head home. Had kind of a crappy day.”

“Well hey, since we’re both already here and all, you want to grab a bite and a few beers?”

Jensen is all ready to tell him to just go to hell, but at the last second he sighs and nods his head.

“Yeah, alright. May as well, not like I got anything else going on.”

 

 

* * *

 

Two weeks later Jared is coming out of a small clinic that he sometimes helps at when they are shorthanded. They called him in to assist with an emergency. One of their patients with a known history of drug abuse had come in and had apparently overdosed. In his haste to get into the building, Jared didn’t pay close attention as to where he parked his car. He came out of the building to see his car in the final stage of getting hooked to a tow truck.

“Hey! Wait! I’m here, please put my car back!”

He runs around the front to come face to face with Jensen. He stops at the glare he receives and then Jensen starts speaking.

“You parked in a no parking zone.”

Jared takes a deep breath before answering.

“Yeah, well, they needed my help with an emergency. I wasn’t worried about where to park the car I was just trying to get in there.”

Jensen smirks as he finishes hooking up the car and heads to the driver’s door.

“That ain’t my problem. I may not be saving lives but I do have a job to do and right now that job involves towing your car to the yard where you’ll need to pay a fine to get it back. Sorry.”

Of course he doesn’t sound sorry at all. Jared is doing his best to not just hit the guy.

“You’re a real piece of work, you know that? Did it ever occur to you to be a decent human being?”

“I don’t have to defend myself to you. Just because you’re a doctor doesn’t make you better than me and it sure as hell doesn’t mean I’m going to give you special treatment. You’re no better than anybody else and if this had been anybody else’s car I still would have towed it. Get over yourself.”

He climbs in and pulls away leaving a fuming Jared in his wake. By the time that Jared gets his car out of impound he is livid. The only thing that is allowing him to keep his cool is that he’s done for the day as far as work is concerned and he is off the next day. He’ll be glad to get a good night’s sleep before heading to Christian and Steve’s place for their barbecue. 

 

* * *

 

Jared opens his door to find Chad waiting for him.

“Hey Jay, you ready to go? Sophia and Genevieve are already there.”

“Yeah, just gotta grab my phone.”

They head out and make the ten minute drive to Chris and Steve’s house. They and Chad had all known each other for a few years and when Chad introduced them to Jared they had all hit it off. They get to the house and immediately seek out Christian at the grill and start making their plates. They make their way into the house right as the doorbell rings. Steve gets up and answers it. Jared cringes when he hears the voice of the man he’d much rather forget. Of course they would invite Jensen. He is, after all, Christian’s friend. What he isn’t expecting is to see his old college buddy. He grins huge and goes to greet his old friend after setting his plate on the coffee table.

“Tom? Hey man, what the hell are you doing here? Do you know Chris and Steve?”

Tom smiles huge and pulls Jared into a hug. Jared only has a moment to register Jensen’s surprised look before Tom is pulling away.

“Jay man! Long time no see! Actually I met them through Jenny here a few years ago.”

“Wait, you and Jensen are dating?”

“Yeah. I ran into him outside of a bar a couple of weeks ago. Asked him out for a couple beers and a bite and we just kind of fell back into our old routine.”

Jared looks at Jensen for a second before smirking and replying.

“Better you than me. I tell you, watch out. He’s a total asshole. I unfortunately met him under less than stellar circumstances. It takes a strong man to be able to put up with someone like him.”

If he hadn’t been looking at Jensen he would have missed the flinch that the other man exhibited. He did see it, though, and his smirk and cocky attitude faltered. He also just now realized that Jensen hadn’t spoken or even made eye contact since Jared approached them.

“Nah, he’s not that bad. You just have to know how to handle him. Ain’t that right, Jenny?”

He pulls Jensen into a tight one armed hug when Jensen speaks up quietly.

“I’m going to find Chris, maybe get a plate.”

He rushes off towards the kitchen. Jared watches him go with a frown before turning back to Tom speaking.

“So how do you know Jenny? Did he tow your car or something?”

He starts laughing until he sees the look on Jared’s face.

“Wait, seriously?”

Jared sighs and replies.

“Yeah, actually. A couple of days ago. I was responding to an emergency at a clinic I volunteer at when they are shorthanded. Apparently I parked in a no parking space and didn’t realize it. He already had my car hooked up when I came out but he refused to unhook it. Said he wouldn’t give me special treatment just because I’m a doctor.”

He snorts once he realizes that he sounds like a whiney six year old. He glances up and sees a look in Tom’s eyes that he can’t decipher. Before he can come to a conclusion Tom grins.

“Well, I guess me and Jenny will just have to figure out a way to make it up to you.”

 

 

* * *

 

“Jen, what the hell is Welling doing in my house?”

Jensen doesn’t look him in the eye when he responds. He focuses on fixing a plate of food.

“He came with me.”

Christian snorts and rolls his eyes.

“Yeah, I know that. What I meant is what the hell you were thinking?!”

Christian takes the plate of food out of Jensen’s hands to make him look up. Jensen huffs and looks him in the eyes.

“Who I date is none of your business.”

“Yeah, it kind of is when I’m the one you’re going to come crying to when it blows up. And we both know that it will blow up, just like last time.”

“Well it’s not like your dickhead friend was interested anyway! I apparently wasn’t even worth his time! I mean, he’s a fucking doctor. Why the hell would he think I was good enough for him when all I am is a damn tow truck driver?”

They get interrupted by someone clearing their throat.  They look up to see Jared step awkwardly into the room.

“Sorry, didn’t mean to interrupt anything, just came for a couple of beers.”

He grabs the beers and heads back to the front room.

 

 

* * *

 

“Well it’s not like your dickhead friend was interested anyway! I apparently wasn’t even worth his time! I mean, he’s a fucking doctor. Why the hell would he think I was good enough for him when all I am is a damn tow truck driver?”

Jared is almost sorry he offered to get him and Tom each a beer when he interrupts whatever conversation Jensen and Christian were having. He clears his throat so that he doesn’t have to hear any more of what Jensen was about to say.

“Sorry, didn’t mean to interrupt anything, just came for a couple of beers.”

They keep quiet while he grabs the beers and leaves. The rest of the afternoon passes both slowly and quickly as Jared keeps going back to how Jensen was acting and what he was discussing with Christian. He only catches about half of what Tom says but is able to play along so that Tom doesn’t notice. He decides to ask Steve if he knows what happened between Christian and Jensen next time he can get a few minutes alone with him.


	2. Chapter 2

Jensen steps into the apartment but doesn’t make it far before Tom grabs him and shoves him into the wall.

“So, you towed his car?”

Jensen tries to push away from the wall but Tom puts more pressure on his chest and grabs his wrist, squeezing hard enough that Jensen is sure there will be a bruise the next morning.

“I was just doing my job…”

“Look at me when you are talking to me, Jenny.”

Jensen slowly meets his glare.

“He was in a no parking zone…”

Before he can continue Tom removes his hand from Jensen’s chest and slaps him hard across the face, causing Jensen’s head to slam into the wall behind him. Tom then grabs his face and forces his gaze back up.

“Yeah. You were doing your job, but my buddy Jared is a fucking doctor. Someone to be respected, who is a hell of a lot more than you’ll ever amount to.”

Jensen’s voice is shaky even though he is trying to stay calm.

“I didn’t know he was your friend when I towed the car.”

“It doesn’t matter. Don’t you think that a doctor should get a free pass on this sort of thing?”

“I…I don’t…it’s the law…”

Tom releases his jaw and slaps him hard again.

“Quit stammering like a little bitch and get ready for bed. I’m tired and you’re pissing me off. We’ll continue this conversation in the morning.”

They get ready for bed in silence and Jensen sighs in relief that Tom is too tired to do anything besides sleep. He doesn’t think he’d be up for anything else.

 

* * *

 

A week later Jared and Tom are out at a bar having a few beers. Jared looks up to see Jensen approaching their table. He notices that Jensen’s clothes seem to be baggier on his frame than previously. Before anything can be said Jared snorts loudly.

“Damn Jensen. Are you so upset over losing me that you just gave up and let yourself go? You look like shit, man.”

Tom frowns as he looks between the two men before turning to Jensen.

“Why didn’t you tell me you two dated? I thought you met when Jenny towed your car.”

Jared sees Jensen’s eyes go wide before he answers.

“We didn’t date, Tom, I swear! Chris tried setting us on a blind date but Jared stood me up.”

Tom scoffs and takes a swig of his beer.

“He probably took one look at you and just left.”

Jensen looks down at the table and is quieter when he speaks.

“That’s what Chris said.”

Tom starts laughing.

“See? Your own friends know you’re not good for anything. Jared didn’t even have to know you to know it’d be pointless dating you.”

Jensen’s reply is so quiet that Jared barely hears it.

“That’s what I said.”

Tom finishes his bottle and signals the waiter for another.

“It’s nice to know you know your place.”

He and Jared start laughing as Jensen just sits there. After another hour they call it a night and go their separate ways. The minute Jensen steps into the apartment Tom is on him. He starts ripping at Jensen’s clothes and pushes him roughly towards the bedroom. Jensen tries pushing him off.

“No, Tom, please? Not tonight.”

Tom slaps him hard across the face before pulling his face closer.

“You will do as I say, when I say. Do you understand?”

Jensen struggles against the hold.

“I know, but I don’t want to do this! Please? Not tonight?”

Tom slaps him again and throes him onto the bed.

“What is it? You’re ready to turn over for Jared but not your own boyfriend?”

Jensen is getting desperate and starts pleading.

“Nothing happened! I swear, Tom! There has not been anything between me and Jared!”

Tom just growls before making Jensen finish getting undressed before he undresses himself. He barely preps Jensen properly before going at it. Jensen decides to stop fighting it and just lets Tom do what he will. When it’s all said and done, Tom is passed out on the other side of the bed and Jensen lies there feeling used. It’s not that he doesn’t enjoy sex with Tom. Usually it is some of the best sex he’s ever had. But when Tom gets into a jealous fit it’s rough and quick. Just long enough for Tom to assert his dominance and in those times Jensen doesn’t enjoy it. In those times he doesn’t get to come to orgasm. He knows he will be sore in the morning so he finally closes his eyes and allows sleep to claim him.

  

* * *

 

A couple of months later and Jared and Chad have the day off from the hospital together. They go to the supermarket to get a few things before heading to Toms. They turn into an aisle and several feet up Jared spots Jensen. He smirks and makes his way over.

“Hey there, _Jenny_. What are you doing here?”

Jensen flinches slightly at the way that Jared sneers the name. He turns a glare to the other man.

“Don’t call me ‘Jenny’.”

Jared frowns slightly when Jensen looks at him and then grins slightly.

“Holy shit, who did you piss off this time? Damn, can’t you go out in public without pissing somebody off?”

Jensen grits his teeth momentarily before replying.

“Fuck off.”

“No, seriously. That is one hell of a shiner you got going there. Do you look for trouble? Do you get off on getting hit?”

Jensen’s retort dies on his lips as he pales. He turns his gaze away as Chad finally announces his presence.

“Jay, come on man. Knock it off.”

Jared scoffs at his friend.

“Why? Picking on _Jenny_ is just too much fun.”

Jensen shoves Jared and raises his voice.

“I said don’t call me that, asshole!”

Jared steps back into his space.

“No. You know, I think I’m going to have to tell Tom how his little boy toy behaves with his friends in public.”

Jensen’s face pales even more than previously, losing all of its color and his voice shakes when he replies.

“Don’t tell Tom. Look, I’ve just got a few things to get and then I’ll be on my way. Just forget everything.”

Chad frowns at the sudden change in Jensen’s stance. He grabs Jared’s arm and pulls him away before he can say anything else.

“Jared, just leave him alone. Come on, I’m sure he didn’t want to get into anything in the middle of the store. Let’s just get our stuff and go.”

Jared levels one last glance at Jensen and wonders about the drastic change in him the last couple of minutes and just sighs.

“Fine.”

They grab what they need and head to Tom’s apartment.

  

* * *

 

Jensen steps out of the store into a gust of cold winter wind with his arms full of groceries when his cell phone rings. He juggles the bags of food to answer before the voicemail picks up.

“Hello?”

_“Hello?! That’s it? You’ve been ignoring my calls for a week! What the hell, Jensen?!”_

Jensen closes his eyes and sighs. He hadn’t been intentionally ignoring Christian but Tom has been really demanding lately.

“Hey Chris. Sorry, I’ve been busy. What’s up?”

_“What’s up besides the fact I’ve been trying to get a hold of you?! Not a whole hell of a lot! I’ve been trying to ask if you wanted to come to a barbecue next weekend.”_

“Yeah, I don’t think me or Tom have anything planned.”

_“……This isn’t an invitation with a plus one, Jensen. I don’t want him in my house. You already know that.”_

“Chris, I can’t come without him.”

_“Well if you can’t come without him then you may as well not come at all. He’s not welcome. Steve and I have both told you that.”_

Jensen sighs and debates on whether to tell him his news. He decides to bite the bullet and gets the reaction he expected.

“Tom asked me to move in with him.”

There is silence from the other end long enough that he thinks Christian hung up.

“Chris?”

_“Please tell me you aren’t seriously this stupid.”_

“Chris, I……”

_“No, Jen just don’t. I don’t want to hear it. You know it’s not going to be any better than last time, right? It won’t be any better, he won’t be any better because he doesn’t care.”_

“I moved in with him two weeks ago.”

_“……Two weeks?! When the hell were you going to tell me?! I mean, you were going to tell me, right?”_

“I didn’t tell you because I knew you’d react like this.”

_“Damn right I’d react like this! In all the dumbass things you’ve done, this has got to be the worst. I can’t believe you’d drop this low again.”_

“Quit being over dramatic!”

_“Over dramatic? I’m being over dramatic. Tell me, Jensen, has he hit you yet?”_

Jensen’s silence tells him all he needs to know. He sighs and softens his voice slightly to try to get through to his longtime friend.

_“Jen, you know I have always been there for you. I was there to fix you up after he tore you apart the last time. Hell, I was there after the mess with your family. But I can’t watch you go through that again. I won’t watch you go through that again.”_

Jensen swallows thickly and his stomach drops out. He is afraid to ask what his longtime friend means.

“Chris what are you saying?”

Chris sighs and takes a minute to pick his words.

_“Jen…if you insist on staying with Tom, moving in with him……I’m sorry but I can’t have anything to do with it. I told you once he was going to be the death of you. I refuse to stand by and watch. If you go through with this you may as well already be dead. Because that’s what you’ll be to me.”_

Jensen’s legs feel weak and he finds a nearby bench to fall into.

“Chris……please don’t do this. I need you man. Please?”

_“Then stop this! Leave him! He’s no good for you man. Just tell him you’ve changed your mind, it’s not working out.”_

Jensen barely gets his words out.

“It’s not that easy, Chris. You don’t understand.”

_“Then help me understand. What is so hard about this? You just pack all your things, tell him you don’t need his damn apartment and he can shove it up his ass and move on with your life! There is someone better out there for you!”_

Jensen swallows thickly before he answers.

“Like Jared? Cause that’s what you told me. You said we would be perfect together and all he did was blow me off. He didn’t even know me and he didn’t think I was good enough. And he’s been nothing but an asshole since then.”

_“Well you did tow his car.”_

“I was doing my job!”

_“He was tending to an emergency, Jen. Maybe if you had unhooked his car he wouldn’t be an asshole to you now. You two might have actually been able to work things out. Everybody else seems to love the guy; I don’t know why you two can’t get along.”_

Jensen closes his eyes and tries to remain calm as a tear rolls down his cheek. He frees up the hand not holding the cell and wipes the tear away.

“Damn it Chris, don’t do this. I fucking need you and you drop this shit on me? Why is everyone making out like I’m the one that screwed everything up? I’m not the bad guy in all this!”

_“Then make it right!”_

“How?! Why does it always have to fall on me to do what everyone else thinks is right?! How can I make it right when not even my best friend is willing to back me up?! You’re not even on my side and you expect me to make the right decision! How can I make the right decision when I don’t have anybody that cares enough to actually support me? Nobody is on my side! Nobody gives a damn about what I want or need but you sure as hell know that Jared’s the fucking angel that does no wrong! Why can’t anybody just see me for once?!”

He’s so upset by the end of his rant that he can’t stop the tears from falling. He feels like his world is crashing down. Christian is the one person he should have been able to rely on but apparently he was wrong again.

_“Jen……”_

“Don’t Chris. You’ve made yourself very clear that I’m apparently not even worth your time anymore. But don’t worry, I won’t bother you anymore since I’m obviously a burden you don’t want in your life.”

_“Jensen, that’s not what I’m saying……”_

“Whatever, Chris.”

He hangs up before Christian can say anything else. He leans forward and holds his head in his hands. He sits on the bench for another twenty minutes trying to calm down; all the while his phone continues to alert Christian trying to call him back. He eventually calms down enough to gather up the groceries and head back to Tom’s apartment.


	3. Chapter 3

Jensen’s still shaken up but has managed to calm down enough so that he only looks tired and out of breath when he steps into the apartment. Tom looks over when he enters.

“Well, well, well. Look who finally decided to show. I guess it takes twice as long to get groceries when you’re walking around harassing good people like Jared here.”

Jensen swallows and glances at Jared’s nasty smirk momentarily before turning back to Tom.

“I wasn’t harassing him……”

Tom interrupts him with a glare.

“Jared told me the whole thing, Jenny.”

“I wasn’t, I swear! I was in an aisle picking out your spices when he approached me!”

“So what, you’re saying he’s a liar now?”

Jensen’s getting desperate to avoid a confrontation.

“No I’m not! I’m just saying it was a misunderstanding!”

“A misunderstanding. You should have been home nearly an hour ago and in fact Jared and Chad beat you back. Care to explain why you are so late?”

Jensen sighs before answering.

“Chris called when I left the store and we got into it. I wanted to calm down before coming back. Plus there are still patches of ice out there. I didn’t want to slip on any of it.”

Tom rolls his eyes and takes a swig of beer before turning back to the television.

“Don’t you think you should get those groceries put away?”

Chad had come back to the main room from the bathroom shortly after Jensen stepped in and frowns at the berating Jensen had just taken. He’s further upset by the fact that Jared is too cowardly to admit he started the whole thing.

“Tom I don’t think you should be so hard on him. Jay wasn’t exactly innocent in it. Jensen was minding his own business when we turned down the aisle.”

Tom scoffs and doesn’t even spare him a glance.

“Yeah right.”

Chad throes a glare at Jared when he answers.

“You know, Tom, you don’t have to be a dick. Much as I love Jay he’s not perfect and I think you owe it to your _boyfriend_ to hear both sides of the story.”

Tom finally turns to throw his own glare back at Chad.

“Well I think you should drop it and mind your own business.”

Chad scoffs and rolls his eyes.

“Whatever, man. This is my business. You weren’t even there.”

He turns to Jensen.

“Why are you so out of breath? And where did you park when you got back, because I didn’t see any ice on the sidewalk when me and Jared came up.”

Jensen frowns a moment before replying.

“I didn’t park anywhere.”

Chad frowns as that sinks in.

“Wait a minute, you walked to the store? It’s freezing out there!”

“My car’s in the garage.”

“So? You couldn’t use Tom’s truck?”

“Tom might have needed it.”

“Bullshit. He’s been here all damn day. There’s no reason you should have had to go out in this weather without a car to take.”

Tom interjects before Jensen can reply.

“Jenny likes walking.”

Chad looks at Tom briefly before turning back to Jensen.

“Is that why you’re out of breath? You had to walk to the store and back?”

Jensen shrugs and replies.

“It’s five flights of stairs to get up here.”

Chad just stands there and stares, unable to form a response for several minutes.

“Why didn’t you just use the elevator? Especially with your arms full.”

Tom speaks up before Jensen has a chance to answer.

“Jenny likes the exercise. He’s been getting a little chunky around the middle so he does what little he can to avoid putting on anymore.”

Chad looks back to see Jensen looking down at the floor. He sees Jensen struggling with the bags and abruptly steps towards him to help him with the bags when suddenly Jensen drops to the floor. The move is so quick that Chad stands there a moment before reacting. He slowly kneels down and starts grabbing some of the bags while he speaks.

“Shit, man, are you okay?”

Jensen keeps looking at the floor but nods his head minutely. His breathing has sped up and Chad suspects he knows why. His voice is shaky when he answers.

“Yeah, I’m fine. Just tired from climbing the stairs, my legs just kind of buckled.”

Chad frowns but helps him to his feet and helps take the groceries into the kitchen. Jensen gets to work putting everything away. Chad watches him for several minutes before talking.

“How did you get that black eye, Jensen?”

Jensen freezes momentarily before continuing to put the groceries away.

“Just pissed off the wrong guy I guess.”

Chad snorts and leans against the wall with his arms crossed.

“Bullshit. We both know who gave it to you.”

He watches Jensen for several minutes in silence before sighing and rubbing a hand down his face.

“Jensen…what he’s doing isn’t okay.”

Jensen snorts before glancing back at Chad.

“You don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“I don’t? I work in the hospital, dude. I’ve seen my fair share of abuse victims. I’ve seen the signs.”

Jensen’s irritation shows as his voice increases in volume and he turns to fully look at Chad.

“I’m not a victim!”

“Not yet, maybe. But you will be if you let him keep it up.”

Jensen drops his gaze and continues with the groceries.

“Jensen, you have to find someone that’ll treat you the way you deserve.”

“Who? Someone like _Jared_? Fucker never wanted me anyway. He couldn’t spare five fucking minutes to ask Chris or someone to let me know what was going on. I would’ve rescheduled. I guess I just wasn’t good enough.”

Chad drops his arms and slowly walks over to Jensen. He lays a hand on the other man’s shoulder but pulls it away the instant he feels Jensen tense up.

“Jensen, he was excited about that date. He was driving everyone crazy because he wouldn’t chill out. And even if you and Jared never worked out you deserve better than this.”

“How the hell do you know what I deserve?”

He puts away the last item and turns enough to face the blonde man. Chad is taken aback by the emotion in those green eyes and sees Jensen holding back tears.

“You don’t even know me. You don’t know if I’m a good person. I mean, how can I be? I hear that everybody loves Jared, he’s just the greatest person that ever existed and he makes everyone his friend. So what’s wrong with me? What the fuck did I ever do to him for him to treat me the way he has? Good people don’t get dumped on like that.”

He reaches up and wipes away a few wayward tears.

“I wasn’t even good enough for my fucking family let alone some god damn doctor who can’t spare a few minutes to say he wasn’t coming.”

They stand in silence for several minutes with Jensen crying quietly trying to get a handle on his emotions when Chad speaks up.

“What happened with your family?”

Jensen snorts as he starts putting the grocery bags in the recycling.

“It doesn’t matter. Don’t know why you care anyway, I’m not your friend.”

“You could be.”

Jensen turns to face him again.

“You don’t want to be my friend.”

He picks up a paper towel to wipe his face off. As Chad starts to reply Jensen interrupts him.

“You should probably get back in there. They’re probably wondering what’s taking you so long.”

Chad sighs and turns towards the door only to find Jared standing there with shifting emotions flitting across his face. Jensen hasn’t noticed him standing there and Chad holds Jared’s gaze for another moment. He sees a note pad on the fridge and writes his cell number down. He tears it off and places it on the counter next to where Jensen is still trying to calm down.

“If you ever need anybody to talk to or if you need help just call me.”

 

 

* * *

 

Jared gets up to get another beer for him and Tom and to see what is taking Chad so long. He slows down as he nears the kitchen when he hears Chad speaking and stops just outside the doorway.

“Jensen, you have to find someone that’ll treat you the way you deserve.”

“Who? Someone like _Jared_? Fucker never wanted me anyway. He couldn’t spare five fucking minutes to ask Chris or someone to let me know what was going on. I would’ve rescheduled. I guess I just wasn’t good enough.”

Jared cringes at the way that Jensen sneers his name and is starting to feel irritated. He moves to go through the doorway but ends up standing in the middle of it when he sees Jensen tense at Chad’s hand on his shoulder. Jared frowns and watches as Chad removes his hand.

“Jensen, he was excited about that date. He was driving everyone crazy because he wouldn’t chill out. And even if you and Jared never worked out you deserve better than this.”

“How the hell do you know what I deserve?”

Jared watches Jensen put a can into the cabinet before turning towards Chad. He can’t see the expression on Jensen’s face but he can hear a slight shake to Jensen’s voice when he starts to speak.

“You don’t even know me. You don’t know if I’m a good person. I mean, how can I be? I hear that everybody loves Jared, he’s just the greatest person that ever existed and he makes everyone his friend. So what’s wrong with me? What the fuck did I ever do to him for him to treat me the way he has? Good people don’t get dumped on like that.”

Jared sees him move one of his hands towards his face.

“I wasn’t even good enough for my fucking family let alone some god damn doctor who can’t spare a few minutes to say he wasn’t coming.”

It’s silent in the kitchen for several minutes as Jensen turns back towards the cabinets he’s standing in front of. Chad’s voice is soft when he speaks.

“What happened with your family?”

Jensen snorts as he starts putting the grocery bags in the recycling.

“It doesn’t matter. Don’t know why you care anyway, I’m not your friend.”

“You could be.”

Jensen turns to face him again.

“You don’t want to be my friend.”

Jensen wipes his face with a paper towel and cuts off whatever Chad is about to say.

“You should probably get back in there. They’re probably wondering what’s taking you so long.”

Jared hears Chad sigh as he turns and their eyes meet. He doesn’t really know what to make of the conversation between Chad and Jensen but he’s feeling a mix of guilt and confusion. He doesn’t want to believe that Tom could be capable of what Chad is accusing him. Part of him is irritated that Chad could so easily accept it when he doesn’t know what Jensen might be capable of and the whole thing just has him aggravated. Jensen is still facing the cabinet and Jared isn’t sure if his friend will out him. Chad doesn’t say anything at first. Jared watches him write something on a piece of paper from the fridge and place it beside Jensen on the counter.

 “If you ever need anybody to talk to or if you need help just call me.”

He follows Chad back into the living room without grabbing the beer. Luckily Tom doesn’t seem to notice. By the time the game is over Jared doesn’t even know who won. He was too caught up in what he heard earlier and he starts thinking back on everything since he first saw Jensen walk in with Tom at that barbecue.

 

* * *

 

Tom sees his friends out and turns to Jensen as soon as the door is shut.

“Are you even capable of going out without causing trouble?”

Jensen shifts nervously as Tom approaches him.

“Tom I swear I wasn’t trying to stir up trouble. I was just trying to get everything so I could get back.”

Tom slaps him hard and Jensen stumbles back a couple of steps.

“I’m getting really tired of you back talking me, Jenny.”

Jensen reaches up to rub his cheek.

“I’m not back talking, I swear! I’m just trying to explain!”

That earns him another slap before Tom is grabbing his arm and shoving him into the wall. He twists Jensen’s wrist hard causing the other man to cry out.

“Tom please! Don’t do this!”

Tom slams a fist into his stomach, causing Jensen to double over. Tom pulls him back up enough to land a fisted blow to his face. Jensen falls to the floor and Tom kicks him hard in the ribs, causing his to scream out again.

“If you could only learn to behave, Jenny, I wouldn’t have to punish you all the time. I’m going to go out for a while. You’d better have everything cleaned up when I get back.”

Jensen lies on the floor for a while willing the pain to subside. He can’t be sure but he thinks his wrist is fractured when it starts to swell within an hour of being twisted. He definitely knows his ribs are bruised if not fractured as well. It’s difficult for him to move around the apartment to clean up with only one good hand and his ribs protesting the movement. He holds his swollen wrist against his chest and prays that his ribs are only bruised and not broken. Once he gets everything cleaned up he grabs his cell and dials. Eventually it just goes to voicemail.

“Chris? Man I need you to pick up. I need to talk to you. Please call me back when you get this.”


	4. Chapter 4

A few days later Jared stops by Chris and Steve’s place after he gets off at the hospital. He steps into the house as soon as Steve opens the door.

“Jared, hey what’s up?”

Jared puts his jacket on the coat hook before turning back to Steve.

“Nothing really. I was just wondering if I could talk to you about something. Is Chris around?”

“No. He took Danneel out to lunch. What’s wrong?”

Jared sighs and leads the way into the kitchen to grab a beer.

“Nothing……I mean, I don’t know if something’s actually wrong. I was wondering if you could tell me something. A while back when you guys had that barbecue I walked in on Jensen and Chris having a heated discussion. I came in on the tail end of it but they were both pretty pissed. Did it have anything to do with why Chris seems to hate Tom? And the other day Chad and I went to Toms to watch a game and I found Jensen and Chad talking about me not thinking Jensen was good enough. They also kept hinting something about Tom which I can’t believe.”

Steve sighs and grabs a beer for himself and sits at the table. He takes a swig and looks at Jared, debating with himself.

“I don’t know if it’s something I should tell you.”

“Please? I just…I need to know if I’m reading too much into things.”

“I can tell you right now you probably aren’t.”

Jared sits across from him and gives his best puppy dog eyes to plead with Steve.

“Come on. I need to know.”

Steve looks at him a moment before snorting.

“Those eyes don’t work on me you know.”

“Yeah I know but I had to try.”

Steve looks at his bottle a moment before looking back up at Jared.

“Alright there’s only some that I can tell you. Tom and Jensen have dated before. Jensen met him right out of high school and it wasn’t exactly the healthiest or easiest relationship. Naturally Chris was protective of Jen and pretty much hated Tom on sight. They were together for several years before Jen finally ended it to pursue other areas of his life.”

Jared thinks for a minute before responding.

“That’s kind of vague. Can’t you give me any more details than that? You’re not exactly helping me prove or disprove my theories here. And what about Jensen’s family? He told Chad that he wasn’t good enough for them.”

“Now that’s something I can’t tell you. It’s not my story to tell. And I wish I could tell you more about Tom but it’s just not my place. I’ve already told you more than I should have.”

They sit together in silence as they finish their beers until Jared decides it’s time to leave.

 

* * *

 

Jared decides to make a stop back at Tom’s place on his way back home. He uses his key to get in and starts calling for his friend when he comes in.

“Tom? Man, are you home?”

He’s about to call out again when he sees Jensen stumble out of the main bathroom. Any further words die on his tongue as he takes in the other man’s appearance. Jensen is wearing a loose t-shirt and plaid pajama bottoms but it’s the way he’s moving that grabs Jared’s attention. Well, that and the fact that Jensen’s right eye is swollen completely shut. Jensen is moving gingerly to the couch where Jared now sees a pillow and blanket laid out. Jensen keeps holding his left arm close to his chest.

“Tom’s not home, Jared. He’s still at work.”

He finally makes it to the couch and carefully sits down as Jared finally finds his words.

“Holy shit, Jensen! What the hell happened?!”

Jensen spares him a glance before making himself comfortable.

“Got mugged.”

Jared frowns and takes a few steps forward.

“You got mugged. This isn’t exactly a dangerous neighborhood, Jensen.”

“That doesn’t make it immune to crime. I don’t know why you care anyway.”

“I’m a doctor and you’ve obviously been hurt.”

He sees a couple different emotions flit across the other man’s face that he can’t figure out before Jensen speaks.

“Of course. You only care because you’re a doctor. You’re all about your hypocritical oath.”

“Jensen…that’s…”

Before he can finish he’s interrupted by Jensen.

“If there’s something you came here for just do it and go. Tom won’t be home until tonight.”

Jared sighs as he turns and leaves, deciding to talk to Chad the first chance he gets.

  

* * *

  


Unfortunately that chance doesn’t come for another week. Jared gets to the hospital for his shift but waits near Chad’s locker. Chad’s shift is almost over and Jared wants to talk to him before he leaves. Chad walks in and glares at Jared for a moment before opening his locker to change.

“What do you want?”

Jared shifts uneasily before replying.

“I wanted to ask you about what you discussed with Jensen the last time we were at Tom’s.”

“It’s none of your business.”

“Chad…I may not have heard the whole conversation, but I caught enough of it to be concerned.”

Chad scoffs and gives Jared a hard look before finishing changing and closing his locker.

“Why do you care now? You sure as hell didn’t care when you helped Tom treat Jensen like shit! You act like Tom is a fucking god! Was he the one you wanted but couldn’t have so you just follow whatever he says? Because we both know that Jensen didn’t deserve what you two were throwing at him! Hell, you didn’t even have the balls to admit that you started the whole damn thing! What the hell is wrong with you, man? I thought you became a doctor so you could help people not help torment them!”

He turns to leave but Jared grabs his arm.

“Wait! Please, just let me talk. I know what I did was wrong but I can’t change that. Just, please listen for a minute.”

Chad looks him up and down before sighing and turning fully back to him.

“I went to Steve a couple of days after the game and he said Tom and Jensen dated before and it didn’t work out. He wouldn’t give me any other details than that. But when I stopped at Tom’s afterward Jensen was there alone and he was in rough shape. His eye was swollen shut and he kept his left arm pressed to his chest. Now it could have been from his ribs or his arm. I couldn’t get a good enough look, and I think he’s been losing weight. His clothes looked a couple of sizes too big on him.”

Chad gapes at him.

“And what?! You just left him like that?!”

“I asked him what happened and he claims he got mugged. I tried to question him further but he said that with Tom gone there was no reason for me to be there so I left. That’s why I wanted to know what he told you.”

They stare at each other for several minutes before Chad sighs and rubs a hand down his face.

“Jared, I don’t think you know Tom like you think you do. For god’s sake, you work in a hospital; you’ve seen the signs of abuse! Think about the way Tom has acted with Jensen whenever we’re around them. Think about the way Jensen acts. He’s quiet; he won’t make eye contact, he flinches when you make sudden moves. For crying out loud, he’s always covered in bruises! But you still insisted he was bringing it on himself! How often have you told other victims it’s not their fault and now you’re not much better than Tom!”

He pauses to take a breath and calm down a moment before continuing.

“I don’t know what happened with his family but I’m pretty sure him and Chris have been on the outs since Jensen moved in with Tom. Shit, Jay, how are we going to get Jensen away from him? I mean I could stop over there on my way home and check on him.”

“Yeah but with as late as it is Tom’s probably home by now.”

They stand in silence thinking for a moment before Jared speaks.

“You’re off next Saturday, right?”

Chad frowns before answering.

“Yeah, why?”

“Well I could have a barbecue or something at my house. Invite everyone over. If I invite Tom, he’s going to bring Jensen. Maybe we can get him alone to talk.”

Chad looks thoughtful before nodding.

“That might work. I can stop by their place and bring it up to them.”

“Okay, sounds good. Text me once you do. I won’t be able to answer right away but I’ll still want to know what happens.”

“Alright.”

 

* * *

 

Chad approaches the door silently and listens for a moment. He doesn’t hear anything so he knocks on it. He hears murmurs from the other side before the door swings open to Tom’s confused face before it splits into a grin.

“Chad! Hey man what’s up? Come on in. What brings you here so late?”

Chad looks around the apartment looking for Jensen before he spots him curled up in an armchair. Some of the bruises are fading and his eye is still slightly swollen.

“Just got off at the hospital but I was talking to Jared before I left. He wants to have a barbecue next Saturday. I told him I’d stop by and let you know, see if you wanted to stop by.”

“Yeah! Sounds great. I don’t have any business going on next weekend. We can be there early afternoon.”

“Sounds good, man. I’ll let him know.”

He turns slightly to Jensen.

“How are you doing? I heard you got mugged.”

Jensen swallows and glances at Tom before looking back at Chad.

“I’m okay. Better than I was, still sore.”

“Did you get a good look at the guys? Did they get caught?”

Jensen hesitates like he’s trying to pick the proper wording.

“No, I didn’t see their faces. It was dark.”

“How many were there? Did they get away with much?”

Jensen starts squirming under the attention and looks back at Tom again. He can’t quite decipher the look on his boyfriend’s face but he knows it isn’t good.

“I don’t know…three or four maybe. They took my wallet.”

Chad can see him getting uncomfortable and decides to quit for now instead of risking Tom getting pissed at Jensen.

“That sucks, man. Hopefully they’ll slip up and get caught.”

Jensen swallows thickly and his voice wavers slightly.

“Yeah, hopefully.”

Chad turns back to Tom.

“So I’ll see you guys Saturday, then.”

Tom nods and follows him to the door.

“Yeah, see you Saturday.”

Chad lingers outside the door for ten minutes listening for any signs that Tom didn’t react well. He hears them talking but not loud enough to make any of it out. He sighs and decides to head home. Inside the apartment, Tom turns to Jensen who has his eyes trained on the floor.

“What have you been telling people, Jenny?”

Jensen looks up as he fights the panic.

“Nothing, Tom I swear! I told you Jared stopped by the other day looking for you. When he asked I just told him I got mugged.”

“What goes on here is nobody’s business. If I find out you’ve been talking I’m going to have to punish you again.”

“I swear I haven’t said anything!”

“You’d better not.”

The look in the other man’s eyes is enough to make Jensen sure he won’t ever talk. 

 

* * *

  


His reprieve doesn’t last long, however, when just a few short days later Tom comes home in a rage. Apparently a tenant on a lower floor approached Tom about the shape Jensen always tends to be in. Jensen takes one look at his face and jumps for the phone. He only manages to dial one number before Tom slams into him, causing the phone to fly out of his grip. He tries pulling away and Tom throes him to the floor.

“What did I tell you about talking, Jenny?”

Jensen fights the heavy weight above him and pleads with his boyfriend.

“I swear I didn’t say anything!”

Tom grabs Jensen’s hair and slams his face into the floor.

“Then why did some douche on the floor beneath us just ask me if I was beating you?! I told you what would happen if you spread our business!”

Jensen is trying to clear his vision when he replies.

“I don’t even know anybody on the lower floor! Tom, please I haven’t said anything to anyone! Please let me up!”

“I’ll let you up when I’m done with you, Jenny.”

He pulls Jensen’s pants down just enough to give him access and he unzips his own. He barely spares enough time to stretch Jensen open when he sinks in. Jensen groans as Tom starts up a quick and harsh pace. Jensen whimpers through it and tries keeping quiet while Tom finishes. When he’s done he zips his pants back up and pulls Jensen’s pants back up. He remains where he is and the pressure is starting to make Jensen’s ribs ache.

“Tom can you please get off of me? My ribs are starting to hurt.”

Tom grabs Jensen’s right arm and pulls it hard behind his back causing Jensen to moan quietly.

“Your ribs are starting to hurt? Do you ever stop whining?”

He wrenches Jensen’s arm roughly further back and up causing the other man to cry out.

“Tom, stop! Please stop, you’re hurting me!”

Tom jerks his arm even more and feels the shoulder and elbow joints pop. He doesn’t know the exact damage to the elbow but from experience he knows that he has at least popped the shoulder out of the joint. Jensen screams at the sharp pain radiating along the right side of his body.

“I’m sorry! Please, I’ll be good! Just please quit hurting me!”

Tom finally releases his arm and leans down to nuzzle at his boyfriend’s ear. His breath ghosts across the shell of the ear when he finally speaks in a softer tone.

“Well since you asked so nicely I can let you off light.”

He finally gets up and pulls Jensen to his feet none too softly. Jensen groans again as his arm falls back to his side. He cradles it gently with his other arm as Tom leads him to the couch. He leaves for a minute and returns with a comforter and pillow.

“I think you’ll be sleeping out here for a while. You can’t seem to keep quiet and I don’t want you waking me up in the middle of the night.”

Jensen sits down carefully and keeps his eyes on the floor when he answers.

“I’m sorry. I’ll try to be quiet.”

“Yeah, well, you’re still sleeping out here. I’m working on a big case right now and I’m not going to have you screw it up for me by keeping me up all night.”

With that he leaves Jensen so he can get ready for bed himself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok, I know I was cruel to Jensen in this chapter, but I promise that not all of my chapters end this way. Just be patient and I promise it gets better for him.


	5. Chapter 5

A few days after Chad’s report he and Jared are going to have a night on the town. They are getting ready to leave when Jared’s landline starts ringing. Jared spares it a glance before heading to the door. Chad looks at it and looks back at Jared.

“Aren’t you going to answer that?”

Jared looks at him and shakes his head.

“No. If it’s important they’ll leave a message. Come on, we’re late and Gen and Sophia won’t hesitate to rip us a new one if we make them wait too long.”

Chad looks at the phone again when the answering machine picks up and turns to follow his friend out. They have a great time and forget all about the phone call. Several days later Chad stops by Jared’s before his shift at the hospital. When he steps in he sees the number one flashing on the machine.

“Jay, don’t you ever check your messages?”

Jared frowns at his machine.

“Yeah, usually. I forgot all about it though ‘cause most people just call my cell. Not many people use my landline anymore unless it’s an emergency.”

He presses play on it and his blood turns cold as they both listen. The sound of thumps and fumbling plays through the speaker before Tom’s voice is heard.

_“What did I tell you about talking, Jenny?”_

The other man’s voice wavers.

_“I swear I didn’t say anything!”_

A louder thud is heard with a quiet grunt.

_“Then why did some douche on the floor beneath us just ask me if I was beating you?! I told you what would happen if you spread our business!”_

_“I don’t even know anybody on the lower floor! Tom, please I haven’t said anything to anyone! Please let me up!”_

_“I’ll let you up when I’m done with you, Jenny.”_

The sound of rustling clothing is heard momentarily before the sound of Jensen groaning comes through. There’s harsh breathing and what sounds like quiet whimpers. It’s not hard to imagine what’s going on. Before too long is the sound of the clothing shifting again before Jensen’s voice is heard again.

_“Tom can you please get off of me? My ribs are starting to hurt.”_

Jensen moans as Tom starts to speak.

_“You’re ribs are starting to hurt? Do you ever stop whining?”_

Jensen cries out suddenly.

_“Tom, stop! Please stop, you’re hurting me!”_

An unpleasant cracking sound is heard right before Jensen screams painfully.

_“I’m sorry! Please, I’ll be good! Just please quit hurting me!”_

Jensen starts quieting down as Tom’s softer voice is heard.

_“Well since you asked so nicely I can let you off light.”_

They hear Jensen groan again before the sound of footsteps retreat. It’s silent just a moment before Tom speaks.

_“I think you’ll be sleeping out here for a while. You can’t seem to keep quiet and I don’t want you waking me up in the middle of the night.”_

_“I’m sorry. I’ll try to be quiet.”_

_“Yeah, well, you’re still sleeping out here. I’m working on a big case right now and I’m not going to have you screw it up for me by keeping me up all night.”_

The machine finally cuts off to the sound of footsteps retreating. Jared and Chad stare at each other in shock before Jared is throwing his shoes on and grabbing his truck keys. Chad is right on his heels as they make their way to the truck. Jared is sure he breaks several traffic laws on their way to Jensen. He parks and they rush up to the apartment where Jared is grateful he has a key. They enter the apartment and he starts calling out.

“Jensen?!”

He hears a quiet groan and spots the other man on the couch. Jensen opens his good eye and whimpers when he sees the giant of a man rush over to him.

“Leave me alone! Please…just don’t…!”

Jared pulls himself up short when Chad grabs his arm. They stand quietly until Jensen gathers himself and realizes who has just entered the apartment. When he takes in the other men he frowns.

“What do you want? Tom’s not here.”

Jared kneels down beside the couch and answers.

“We didn’t come here for Tom. I got your message.”

Jensen continues to frown as he tries to figure out what the doctor is talking about.

“What message? I didn’t say anything.”

“When you called you got my answering machine.”

“Jared, I don’t even know your number. When did I supposedly call you?”

Now it’s Jared’s turn to frown.

“A few days ago. You called my house phone before me and Chad went out. We were running late and I couldn’t answer it so my machine picked up…it recorded what Tom did to you.”

Jensen tries to think back and his face pales slightly as he realizes what happened. Then he fully takes in what Jared said and he looks up with hurt welling deep in his green eyes.

“You were home?”

Jared is taken slightly aback by the emotion in those beautiful eyes.

“Yeah. Chad and I were heading out for a few drinks with friends and we were running late.”

A lone tear makes its way down Jensen’s face.

“A night on the town is more important than answering a call from me?”

Jared sits there for a moment trying to figure out how to answer.

“No, Jensen, that’s not it. I had no idea it was you! I am so sorry I didn’t answer!”

“That was three days ago. In three days you couldn’t check your machine?”

Jared swallows thickly and has to fight back his own emotion at what is playing across the other man’s face.

“Yeah…I just…it’s been kind of busy at the hospital and I just forgot to check my machine.”

“Or maybe you just didn’t care.”

Jared frowns again and tries desperately to make the other man understand.

“Jensen, that’s not it, I swear! I just got your message and then we hightailed it over here to check on you.”

Chad watches on quietly and his heart nearly breaks at the sight of the other man. The hurt displayed on those features combined with the swollen eye and busted nose are nearly more than he can take. Jensen speaks up then.

“I didn’t even mean to call you. Nine was the only number I was able to dial before the phone was knocked away. It’s not my fault Tom programed your number as a speed dial.”

“Then who were you trying to call?”

Jensen snorts and finally turns his face away.

“It doesn't matter anymore. Why do you even care?”

“Because, he’s been beating you! We came here to help you. I need to get you to the hospital.”

More tears fall down Jensen’s face and he fights to keep his lower lip from trembling.

“I still don’t know why you care. You hate my fucking guts. You’ve done everything you could to make me feel like shit. You didn’t want me. You didn’t want me anymore than my own fucking family did. Why should you care what happens to me?”

“Jensen, please. I can see how swollen your arm is. We need to see if it’s broken.”

Jensen swallows thickly and his voice is rough with emotion when he replies.

“I think you need to go. You didn’t want me and you obviously didn’t care enough to check your messages or even answer your damn phone when I might have needed you to.”

“Please, we want to help.”

Jensen turns back to him and doesn’t even try fighting the tears anymore.

“You can’t help me now. Please, just leave me alone. You never wanted me anyway.”

He turns back away and closes his eyes. Jared sighs in defeat and turns to Chad. They talk quietly for several minutes before Chad approaches Jensen. The abused man looks up and speaks before Chad has the chance to.

“Don’t waste your breath. I’ve said what I’m going to say and I’m not coming with you.”

Chad looks at him a moment before nodding at Jared. He turns back to Jensen and answers.

“Well, the way I see it you don’t really have a choice. You’re too hurt and sore to do anything so I don’t see how you can stop us.”

With that, he and Jared carefully grab Jensen to lift him off of the couch. They were correct in that Jensen can’t stop them. However, they discover that he is so sore and bruised that it is nearly impossible for them to get him up without causing him more pain. Jensen is groaning loudly by the time they have him on his feet.

“Ow, damn it! Please just leave me alone! I’ll be fine!”

He’s practically pleading with them because the pain coursing through him is so intense. At one point they stop when his shirt rides up enough for them to see that his lower back is one large black and purple bruise. They try not to bump his right arm which is so swollen and bruised that Jared is sure it is dislocated. It is a grueling task but they finally get him to Jared’s truck and then to the hospital. Jeff Morgan, a fellow doctor, assists in getting Jensen examined and set up since the abused man refuses to let Jared touch him again. They discover that his shoulder is indeed dislocated and his right elbow is broken in addition to some fractured ribs and nose. They get him all fixed up but have to put him on some heavy duty pain medications since there isn’t much of him that isn’t damaged and bruised. They hook him up to fluids since he is slightly dehydrated and Jeff notes that he is underweight. Jeff had the forethought to take pictures of everything they had found just in case but Jensen refuses to press charges so they save the pictures. Two days later Jared walks in to Jeff talking to Jensen who is facing the window.

“I want to keep you here for the rest of the week, but then you should be okay to go home.”

Jensen turns to face Jeff.

“Has anyone stopped by?”

Jeff frowns for a minute before Jensen continues.

“To check on me?”

Jeff sighs and has to force himself to maintain eye contact. He can see the emotion in Jensen’s eyes and knows the other man already knows the answer to his query.

“Jared called your friends, Chris and Steve.”

“But they haven’t come in?”

“No, not as of yet.”

“What about Tom?”

Jeff grits his teeth knowing that Tom is the reason Jensen’s lying in the hospital bed.

“No, Tom hasn’t come in.”

“Have any of them called? What did Chris say when Jared got a hold of him?”

Jeff sighs and rubs the back of his neck before answering.

“Jared had to leave a message. We haven’t heard back from any of them as far as I know but I haven’t checked in with the receptionists. I can go ask them……”

Jensen interrupts before he can finish. He carefully rolls on his side to face the window as tears he had been holding back fall unchecked.

“Don’t bother wasting your time. They’re not going to call.”

He closes his eyes and brings his good arm up over his face as he sobs quietly. Jeff looks at Jared and since he is at a loss for words, decides it’s best to let Jensen be alone for a while. Jensen doesn’t say anything to anyone for the duration of his stay. Nobody comes, nobody calls, not until Jensen is discharged and Tom actually shows to take him home. Before Jensen is wheeled down to the lobby Jared makes one last plea.

“Jensen, please don’t go with him.”

Jensen moves his eyes from his lap to Jared for a moment before returning them.

“I have to. I have nowhere else to go. I have no job, no apartment and no money. Where the hell could I go?”

Jared surprises himself by what comes out of his mouth.

“You can come home with me.”

Jensen looks up sharply at that and frowns.

“Why would you want me to come home with you?”

“Well, I just……it…I mean…”

He takes a deep breath to calm himself. He hadn’t realized he was going to suggest it until he said it.

“He’s not good to you. He’s not good for you. I hate seeing you covered in bruises knowing what’s going on.”

“You never cared before. You seemed pretty happy about making sure I knew you hated me.”

Jared feels helpless as he is overcome with guilt.

“I know, Jensen but I am so sorry! I had no idea what was going on then!”

Jensen looks back down at his lap.

“That’s because you didn’t want to know. Chad knew after the day at the grocery store. Hell, Chris and Steve knew. Nobody ever gave a damn before so why should you now?”

“Please, just don’t go with him. You don’t have to come with me. I can call Chris. You can stay with them until you’re back on your feet.”

Jensen snorts before turning tear filled eyes back to Jared.

“Chris hasn’t spoken to me or taken my calls since I moved in with Tom. Hell, he wouldn’t even call up here after you left a message that I was here.”

“Yeah, but if he knew that you left Tom…”

“It doesn’t matter. He should have had my back but he took off first chance he didn’t have to deal with me anymore. Face it, Jared, you’re better off without me anyway. You didn’t want me, but Tom did.”

Jared sees a single tear roll down Jensen’s cheek. He sighs when he realizes that he’s not going to be able to get Jensen to change his mind. He stands by as Tom helps Jensen into his truck and watches them drive away.


	6. Chapter 6

Christian breathes a heavy sigh of relief as he helps Steve bring in the rest of their bags.

“Man, I am beat. I still can’t believe someone stole my damn phone. I bet it was one of the new roadies.”

Steve comes in behind him and drops his bags on the floor.

“You probably just lost it. It was pretty crazy after the show. I just can’t believe you aren’t more careful with it. Remember when we played in L.A.? It took you two days to find it.”

Christian snorts and turns to his friend.

“Yeah, well, at least I didn’t leave my charger at home. Your phones been useless for most of the trip. Think anybody’s tried calling?”

“I don’t know. Let me plug it in and see.”

Steve walks over to the counter where he left his phone charger. Once his phone is plugged in he turns it on to see a missed call and message.

“Looks like Jay called my cell a couple of days after we left.”

He types in his password and listens to the message.

_“Hey Steve, its Jared. Listen, I was talking to Chad a few minutes ago and we’re going to have a barbecue at my place Saturday after next. I’m having everyone over. If you guys aren’t busy you should swing by.”_

Chris waits patiently for Steve to finish messing with his phone before speaking.

“Well?”

Steve puts his phone back on the counter and answers.

“He’s having a barbecue this coming Saturday and wants us to come.”

Chris nods his head as he lets out a huge yawn.

“Sounds good. Look, I gotta get some sleep. I’ll see you in the morning.”

Steve makes his way to his own room as he replies.

“Yeah, you too.”

With that he gets settled in for some much needed sleep.

  

* * *

 

It seems to take forever but the Saturday of Jared’s scheduled barbecue finally arrives. About half of his guests have shown up but no Tom or Jensen. He’s strung tight with worry that they won’t come and he will be unable to see how Jensen is doing. He heads to the door when he hears his doorbell and is surprised to see Chris and Steve standing there with Danneel and Genevieve.

“Hey, guys! I wasn’t expecting you to show.”

They make their way through the door when Steve turns to Jared.

“You left a message on my cell.”

Jared closes the door and follows them through the house.

“Yeah, but you never called back so I didn’t think you got it. Actually I’ve tried calling both of your phones, where the hell have you guys been? I was kind of pissed that it was ignored, I really needed to talk to you.”

He turns a slightly hard look to the men in question and they can’t quite decipher the expression. Steve rushes to explain before anything can come of it.

“We had a gig in Kansas and were gone for a little over a week. I forgot my phone charger at the house and Chris lost his phone while we were out there.”

Chris picks then the join the conversation.

“What did you need to talk to us about?”

Jared frowns slightly before shaking his head. He doesn’t see the point in bringing up what happened at this time since it’s likely to cause an argument.

“Nothing, it doesn’t matter anymore. So the food’s in the kitchen and beer’s in the fridge. Go ahead and help yourselves.”

They break away but Danneel and Genevieve give each other a confused look. They can tell something’s up but since it doesn’t appear that Jared is in the sharing mood decide to just fix up their plates. A short while later, Chris and Danneel are chatting in the dining room when the doorbell rings. Jared opens the door and breathes a sigh of relief to see Tom standing there with Jensen at his side.

“Hey, Tom! Glad you could make it!”

The two men enter but Jared notices that Jensen keeps his eyes down. His eye is finally looking better but he still holds his arm across his body.

“Jay-Man! Hey, thanks for the invite!”

“No problem. I realized we hadn’t had everyone get together in a while.”

He looks at Jensen and addresses him.

“How are you feeling? You still look rough.”

Jensen glances up but it’s Tom who answers.

“Yeah, poor guy is such a klutz. Took a nasty fall down the stairs the other day. I guess Chad was right, maybe he should use the elevator.”

He’s laughing but Jared doesn’t join in. He’s watching Jensen as Tom speaks but the other man won’t make eye contact. He sighs before replying.

“Well, at least you’re up and about. The foods all set up in the kitchen, beers in the fridge. Help yourselves.”

He watches them make their way into the kitchen to fix their plates as Christian approaches.

“What the hell is that asshole doing here?”

Jared turns to him and frowns.

“Well it’s my house and he’s my friend, so I invited him. Besides, I knew that Jensen would come with him and I think you two need to talk.”

Christian snorts and crosses his arms.

“You set this whole thing up so that me and Jen will just kiss and make up? I haven’t even heard from him in forever.”

“Maybe that’s because you quit taking his calls.”

“Is that what Jensen said?”

“Not to me, but I know you Chris. You’re vindictive when you’re pissed about something.”

Chris sighs and rubs a hand down his face before holding his hand up.

“Look, just drop it man. Whatever you’re playing at isn’t going to work. We’re in a funk right now but that’s none of your business.”

Before Jared can answer Christian storms off. Jared sighs and goes off in search of his blonde friend. He locates Chad and approaches him.

“Tom and Jensen just got here.”

Chad looks around trying to spot them.

“Where are they at? How’s Jensen look?”

“They’re in the kitchen grabbing some food. Jensen looks better than he did the other day. His eye is still slightly bruised but it’s open. I’m still worried about his arm though. He’s still holding it against his chest.”

“Are you sure it’s his arm? His ribs are still going to be sore for a while too.”

“I don’t know. I just hope Tom hasn’t done anything to reinjure everything we patched up at the hospital. Honestly I’d rather it be his arm than his ribs. If they’re fractured instead of just being bruised this time he could risk a punctured lung.”

“Maybe I could distract Tom long enough for you to talk to Jensen, see if he’ll let you look him over. If Tom has done more it’s not like he’s going to get Jensen checked out. Not so soon after being released for similar injuries.”

“I don’t know if he’ll talk to me but it’s worth a shot.”

Their chance comes an hour later when Tom leaves Jensen in the living room so he can mingle. Jared sees him slightly curled up in an awkward position on his couch. He has his right knee up close to his chest and he’s hunched slightly. Jared sees his plate of food barely touched. He walks over and sits down heavily on the couch. He sees Jensen wince once he is fully seated.

“Hey, are you okay?”

Jensen glances at him before shifting uncomfortably.

“I’m fine.”

“You didn’t eat much.”

“I’m not hungry.”

Before Jared replies he notices how pale Jensen is and takes in the odd way he’s sitting.

“Didn’t your mom teach you that it’s rude to put your shoes on other people’s furniture?”

Jensen takes a deep breath and swallows before slowly uncurling, wincing again as he does so.

“S-sorry.”

His arm is now wrapped around his abdomen instead of being held against his chest.

“Jensen…you’re still holding your arm against yourself. You should have been healed up enough by now to comfortably put it down. Did Tom do something again?”

“I’m fine.”

“You’re not fine. Anybody that looks at you can see that. Now either you’re ribs are hurt or your arm is. I can’t figure out which. Why haven’t you been to see Jeff again if you weren’t better?”

Jensen snorts before turning towards him.

“I don’t have a job. No job means no money or insurance.”

Jared interrupts his first thought with a new one.

“Wait, I thought you towed cars?”

“Yeah, well Tom doesn’t want a partner that works. He makes more than enough to support us both, so I quit. Besides, I told you at the hospital I didn’t have a job.”

“I guess I was just so desperate to keep you from going with him that I missed that. Anyway, that’s not the point. If he makes more than enough for both of you then why doesn’t he just give you some money so you can see a damn doctor?”

“A doctor like you?”

Jared doesn’t know what to say so Jensen continues.

“I’m fine. I don’t need a doctor.”

He turns away and closes his eyes against a sudden pang in his stomach and the wave of nausea that hits him. He keeps his eyes closed when he speaks.

“Where’s your bathroom?”

Jared doesn’t hesitate to answer once he sees how green Jensen suddenly is.

“It’s down the hall, last door on the left.”

Jensen carefully stands up and moves as fast as his sore body will allow him. He makes it to the toilet right before he vomits up what little he was able to eat. Jared sits there staring down the hall when he realizes that Danneel is standing in the doorway.

“Jared what the hell was that?”

“He said he wasn’t feeling well.”

“That’s crap and you know it.”

“How long have you been standing there?”

“Long enough to know that his situation is pretty suspicious and that you have a pretty good idea of what’s going on. Does Chris know?”

Jared looks at her for a moment before replying.

“I think he knew before anybody else. I think that’s why he quit talking to Jensen when he moved in with Tom. Steve said they dated before but wouldn’t give me any details on it.”

Danneel looks pissed.

“Son of a bitch!”

With that she turns and leaves the room. Jared follows her through the house until she finds Christian in the dining room. She doesn’t give him a chance to say anything before she walks up and slaps him across the face.

“Asshole!”

He puts a hand to his face before turning back to her.

“What the hell, Danneel?!”

Jared intervenes before anymore can be said. They are in a room full of people, Tom being one of them and he doesn’t want Tom to have a reason to go after Jensen again.

“Guys! Chill out and let’s take this somewhere a little more private please!”

He quickly ushers them out of the room as the other guests watch. Tom was talking to Steve when the blow up occurred and he turns back to him.

“What was that about?”

Steve has an idea of what’s going on, especially with the frantic look on Jared’s face for them to keep quiet. Of course, he’s not telling Tom.

“Chris and Danneel get into spats on occasion. I can’t keep track of why but hopefully Jared will be able to calm them down.”

Tom nods thoughtfully and takes a drink of his beer. Meanwhile Jared leads the disgruntled pair up the stairs to his master bedroom where they can have some privacy. When he shuts the door Danneel hits Christian again who can’t keep quiet any longer.

“Would you stop hitting me and tell me what the hell is going on?!”

“What the hell is wrong with you?! You knew Tom was an abusive asshole and yet you still turn Jensen away like that?! I thought you two just had some stupid argument, but no! You kicked him to the curb because he’s being abused! What the fuck, Christian?!”

“I told him that Tom was going to be the death of him!”

“So you thought you’d help it along?! All you’re doing is helping Tom isolate him from anyone that could actually help him! I thought you were better than this, Christian!”

She turns and storms out, leaving a fuming Christian and concerned Jared in her wake.


	7. Chapter 7

They stand in silence for a few minutes before Christian turns to Jared.

“What the hell, man?!”

Jared holds his hands up and steps back.

“Hey, I didn’t tell her anything. I was talking to Jensen and I didn’t know she was standing there. I was trying to get him to admit what Tom’s been doing.”

“Yeah, well good luck with that. That boy is the poster child for denial.”

“Chris, I’m going to ask you something and I need you to tell me. It’s about something Jensen told Chad when we went to Tom’s place to watch a game. He said he wasn’t good enough for his family. What did he mean by that? What happened with his family?”

Chris looks at him while he debates. Jared continues speaking when it doesn’t look like he’s going to answer.

“I tried asking Steve but he wouldn’t tell me. Said it wasn’t his place.”

“That’s because it’s not.”

“Chris, whatever happened with his family I think is his motivation for sticking it out with Tom. Now please tell me.”

Christian sighs deeply before rubbing a hand down his face.

“Alright, fine just don’t go back to Jensen with it. He’d kill me if he knew I told you. We grew up together, have always been best friends. Jen came out to his parents right before he turned sixteen. Needless to say they didn’t take it well. Every last one of them disowned him for it. Luckily my family isn’t so closed minded. My parents let him move in with us so he could finish high school. Soon as we graduated we moved out here where Jensen first met Tom. He was a controlling and abusive asshole then too. Four years and countless hospital visits later I finally convinced Jen to leave him.”

Christian snorts and gives Jared a hard look.

“That’s why I set you up with him. You two would’ve been perfect together. You’re the one guy that could’ve shown Jen that not every guy hits. You’re the one guy that could’ve shown Jensen he’s not just a punching bag. I thought that if he was with you he’d be rid of Tom for good.”

They stand in silence for several minutes before heading back downstairs. Jared feels more guilt than he ever has. When they get back to the main room Danneel approaches them with a concerned look.

“Guys I think Jensen’s really sick. He’s been in the bathroom this whole time; I can’t get him to come out.”

Right as they reach the bathroom door Jensen finally emerges. Jared is instantly concerned by his appearance. His face is drawn in pain and he’s still holding his stomach. Before anyone can say anything Tom comes out of nowhere.

“Jenny, where’ve you been? I’ve been looking everywhere for you.”

Jensen looks up at Tom.

“Can we go? I’m not feeling well.”

Tom frowns for a minute before replying.

“You probably just need to lie down. I’m sure Jay has a spare room you can use.”

Jared gapes at him before he can force the words out.

“Tom I think he needs to see a doctor! He really doesn’t look good.”

Tom just smirks at him and Jared wants to slap it right off his face.

“Well that’s perfect, Jay. YOU’RE a doctor. Why don’t you take him to your guest room and examine him. He’s been fighting a bug for a few days, I’m sure he just needs to rest.”

Danneel has to grab Christian’s arm to keep him from going after the other man. He’s turned and already making his way towards the kitchen. Jared grabs Jensen when it looks like he’s going to fall over.

“Whoa, easy man. Come on. The spare room’s this way. What symptoms have you had?”

Jensen makes his way with Jared slowly. He snorts and weakly tries pulling his arm away but Jared refuses to let go until they’ve reached the bed.

“I don’t need your help.”

He stops for a second and leans against the wall. His breathing is slightly faster than it had been and he grunts quietly. Jared gently pulls him away from the wall and gets him settled in the bed. He notices that Jensen immediately turns onto his side and curls into himself. Christian and Danneel close the door quietly and watch as Jared begins his examination.

“Jensen, you need to roll onto your back.”

Jensen looks at him pitifully before turning over. He keeps his knees drawn up though.

“Can you straighten your legs?”

Jensen glances at him again and his voice wavers when he answers.

“I’d rather not.”

“Jensen, I need to palpate your abdomen. I need your legs straight for that. I also need you to move your arm.”

Jensen hesitates and Jared is sure he’s going to refuse before he even says anything.

“Look, I’m fine. Tom’s probably right. I just need to rest for a while.”

“Jensen…the way you’re acting and moving…the way you keep holding your side, I suspect you have appendicitis. That’s not something that sleep can fix. That’s something that needs prompt medical attention. Tom said you’ve been sick for a few days. Have you been having abdominal pain for that long?”

Just as he thinks Jensen’s going to protest again he sighs dejectedly and nods his head minutely. Jensen turns his eyes down before answering.

“Yeah.”

“What kind of pain is it? Is it sharp or dull? Where is it mostly located?”

Jensen used his left hand to indicate the right side of his stomach.

“Mostly here. Kind of stabbing.”

Jared sighs and steps closer to the bed.

“I’m sorry but I have to feel your abdomen. I have to know if it might be appendicitis. Please straighten your legs and move your arm.”

Jensen does so slowly, practically holding his breath while he does. Once he does Jared slowly starts feeling around on the other man’s stomach. Jared watches his face the whole time and can tell that Jensen is in obvious pain. His eyes are pinched shut and his face is turned away. He’s clenching his fists in the blanket and he’s breathing faster. When Jared presses on an especially tender spot Jensen cries out and turns back over with his knees drawn up. He whimpers loudly into the pillow under his head as Jared sends Christian to get Chad and he makes a call to the hospital.

“Jeff? Yeah, it’s Jared. I need you to get a room ready, I’m bringing in someone I’m sure has appendicitis……Yeah……Okay, thanks. We’ll be there as soon as we can.”

Just as he ends the call Chad and Chris come back in. Danneel had moved to the side of the bed and is carding her fingers through Jensen’s hair. He is still groaning quietly as they get him moved to Jared’s truck to take him to the hospital. 

 

* * *

 

Jared can’t do much more than stand by and watch Jensen’s procedure since he’s not a surgical doctor. They had decided that a laparoscopic surgery was the best route for the appendectomy since it has less chance of scarring and a shorter recovery time. They were relieved to find that while the appendix was inflamed, it had not had enough time to rupture. While he’s there they notice a fading bruise just over the area of his appendix and while it’s not as common, appendicitis can be caused by trauma to the abdomen. Unfortunately they can’t get Jensen to admit to anything. He keeps insisting it was due to his clumsiness. Jared stands in the door as Christian walks to the bed once Jensen is settled in his room. Danneel stands back to allow the old time friends some space. Christian sits in a plastic chair and addresses his friend.

“Hey Jen. How are you feeling?”

Jensen looks at him for a moment before shrugging and replying.

“I’ve been better.”

Christian snorts.

“Yeah, well, you’ve also been worse.”

Jensen sighs and turns his eyes down to his lap.

“Chris, please don’t start. I just got out of surgery, I’m tired and those damn drugs are still making everything fuzzy.”

Chris is about to argue before getting a really good look at the other man and just nods.

“Okay, Jen. But just so you know, we will be talking about this once you’re discharged. I sent Steve back to the house to set up the other bedroom for you.”

Jensen looks up at that and frowns.

“Chris…I’m not coming home with you.”

“Like hell you’re not!”

Jensen interrupts before he can continue his rant.

“Like hell I am! You’ve ignored me for what, months now?”

“I’ve been ignoring you? The last time we spoke, you fuckin’ hung up on me! I tried calling you back for nearly half an hour and you refused to pick back up!”

Jensen swallows hard and turns away as his eyes fill with tears. He tries preventing them from falling as his voice wavers.

“Yeah, well, when I tried calling you after that fucking sasquatch and blondie over there pissed him off you didn’t pick up. And when they tried reaching you after hauling me in here the last time you didn’t answer either. Didn’t call or even fucking come up here!”

He pauses to try to regain his composure. Chris’ retort dies on his tongue when he realizes what Jensen just said. He frowns and looks at Jared before looking back at Jensen.

“What the hell do you mean, ‘last time’?”

Jensen refuses to answer or even look up so Jared answers for him.

“He was in pretty rough shape. Chad and I found him with a dislocated shoulder and bruised ribs among other bruises.”

Jared is starting to get angry again as he continues.

“I tried calling your damn phone several times and left messages but you hadn’t bothered telling anybody that you were even going out of town.”

Chris sighs when he answers.

“Look, I’m sorry we didn’t tell anybody we had a gig but it was kind of the last minute. I already told you I lost my damn phone so I didn’t get your messages! Why the hell didn’t you leave that message on Steve’s cell? The only message he got was for your damn barbecue!”

“I figured since he didn’t call back about that and you obviously weren’t calling back I didn’t see the point!”

Before anything else can be said Danneel interrupts and puts a hand on Jared’s shoulder.

“Hey! Enough you two! If you’re going to argue then I think you need to leave because I’m sure that Jensen sure as hell doesn’t need this right now!”

She gives a pointed look to each man before sitting on the other sided of Jensen’s bed. She tentatively reaches out and grabs Jensen’s hand in hers. It’s quiet for several minutes before Chris lets out a harsh breath and turns back to Jensen.

“Look, I’m sorry man. But this has got to stop! I can’t keep watching you go through this!”

Jensen still won’t look at him and his voice is quiet when he replies, a couple of wayward tears making an appearance.

“I have nothing else to say Chris.”

“So what? You’re going back to him?”

The silence is answer enough so Christian gets up and storms out of the room. Jensen ends up staying in the hospital for a week before he’s discharged. Jared pleads with him yet again to stay with him since he has a spare bedroom but Jensen keeps refusing. Jared watches dejectedly yet again as Jensen is driven away from him.


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am soooo sorry this took so long to put out!! I know where this story is going to go, but when I got about halfway through this chapter I was caught at a fork in the road. I had two different ways this chapter could go and I had the hardest time deciding which way to go. I hope this update is worth the wait and I'll try not to take nearly as long with the next chapter. Thanks for being so patient!

Danneel is over at Christian’s place having lunch a couple of days after Jensen leaves the hospital.

“I can’t believe you didn’t stop him, Christian.”

He looks up from his sandwich to see Danneel glaring at him. He rolls his eyes and takes another bite.

“He is a grown ass man, Danni. If he wants to fuck up his life that’s his problem.”

She gets up and puts her dishes in the sink before turning around and crossing her arms.

“You’re supposed to be his best friend! This is the attitude that landed him in the hospital the last time!”

Christian raises his voice in exasperation.

“What the hell do you want me to do?!”

“I want you to help him!”

“You can’t help someone who doesn’t want it!”

“Yeah, well, you haven’t exactly given him a reason to think he could get it, now have you?”

Christian stands up and places his plate on the counter.

“What the hell is that supposed to mean?!”

She reaches for her jacket.

“You know exactly what it means. If you’re not willing to help him then I guess I’ll have to.”

She’s out the door before he has a chance to respond. She pulls her phone out before she gets to her car and starts talking once the other end picks up.

“Chad? Hi, it’s Danneel, I need your help…yeah, we need to get him out of there, will you help me?...Okay, meet me out front. Call Jared too, he needs to be there. He’s the only one that might be able to talk him down……Well, if he can’t then at least he’ll have the size advantage. He’s the only one big enough to go toe to toe with Tom……Yeah, thanks. I’ll see you in a few, bye.”

 

* * *

 

 

Chad hangs up his phone and looks up right as Jared walks over to his locker. They had managed to end up with the same shift and were getting ready to head out. He finishes getting changed and walks the few feet to Jared’s locker.

“Jay, man, we gotta talk.”

Jared looks at him as he pulls his shirt over his head.

“What’s up?”

“Danneel just called me. She wants us to meet at Tom’s apartment.”

Jared halts his movements once he sits on the bench to put his shoes back on. He looks up at his blonde friend and wishes he didn’t already know the answer to his question.

“Why are we meeting her at Tom’s place?”

Chad grabs his jacket and closes his locker.

“You know why. We’ve got to get Jensen away from Tom.”

Jared sighs and finishes putting his shoes on.

“Chad, we can’t force Jensen to leave Tom if he doesn’t want to.”

“Did it ever occur to you that maybe it’s because nobody’s trying? Do you really think he enjoys getting hit?”

“Then why doesn’t he just leave?”

“Oh for fuck’s sake, Jay! We see this every day! He has no job, no money and as far as he knows, nobody that gives a damn! You’re the only one who has any chance of holding Tom off so me and Danneel can get Jensen out of there. Jay…he’s going to kill him if we don’t do something.”

Jared seems to deflate as he turns his gaze down. He’s quiet for a moment before looking up and nodding.

“Okay, fine. You’re right. Part of this is my fault anyway. If I had just rescheduled we could’ve actually hit it off.”

He stands up and heads for the area to the employee parking with Chad on his heels. 

 

* * *

 

 

They pull up in front of Tom’s apartment building to see Danneel fidgeting with her cell. A look of relief passes across her face when she sees them. They park and walk over to her as she speaks.

“Well, are you ready for this?”

Jared sighs and looks at the building before them.

“As ready as we’ll ever be I guess.”

They enter the building and make the trek up to the apartment with Jared in the lead. He knocks on the door and is greeted with a surprised grin from his old friend.

“Jay? Hey man, what are you doing here? Coming to check up on Jenny I guess?”

He opens the door fully and frowns slightly when he sees Chad and Danneel as well. Jared looks over at Jensen and is relieved to see he appears to have no new injuries. He turns back to Tom as the other two approach Jensen.

“Tom, we need to talk.”

He watches Jensen be lead by the others into the bedroom. Tom turns back to Jared once the door is shut.

“Jared, what the hell is going on?”

“We’re taking Jensen.”

Tom frowns and crosses his arms before stepping closer to Jared.

“What do you mean you’re taking Jensen?”

Jared takes the intimidating stance as it is and stands up straighter, making the slight height advantage more noticeable.

“I know you’ve been hitting him. I know that all of your stories of him being ‘clumsy’ are nothing but bullshit and I know that this has happened before. What the hell happened to you, man? This isn’t you!”

Tom gets an ugly grin and scoffs at him.

“Where the hell are you getting all of this? Did Jenny tell you this?”

“No, JENSEN didn’t tell me anything. In fact he refused to tell me a damn thing. He kept feeding me and everyone else the same stories you’ve been spreading.”

“So tell me, Jay, if our stories are the same then why do you suspect abuse?”

“I don’t suspect it. All of the evidence is there. His injuries don’t fit the stories you have made him memorize. Add that to the amount of times it’s happened and the way he acts around you! He’s scared to death to so much as speak out of turn!”

Tom puts his arms down and steps closer to Jared.

“You’d better stop this before you say something you’ll regret. If I recall, you had just as much fun picking at him as anybody else.”

“Yeah, I picked on him. Like a fucking bully and coward I verbally attacked him every chance I got. That was before I realized that with as long as we’ve known each other I really didn’t know you. How many other partners have you abused?”

Jared is caught off guard by the punch that lands across his jaw. He’s able to recover in time to block Tom’s other hit and is able to land his own to the other man’s stomach. They practically tear each other apart as they gradually destroy the living room. The furniture gets overturned and the coffee table ends up smashed. Jared is finally able to get the upper hand and hits Tom hard enough to leave him in a dazed heap on the floor. He walks over to the bedroom door and knocks quietly before opening it. He sees Jensen sitting on the bed nearly hyperventilating with Danneel at his side trying to calm him down. Chad steps aside to allow Jared to enter.

“Hey, is everyone alright in here?”

He’s looking at Jensen when he says it but the other man is staring out at nothing. Danneel finally looks from Jensen to Jared and replies.

“Physically, yeah. Jensen kind of flipped his lid when you guys slammed into the door and I’ve been trying to calm him ever since. Is Tom still out there?”

Jared looks over and sees the bags they had packed of Jensen’s meager belongings and picks it up when he answers.

“Yeah. He’s still kind of out of it though so we need to get Jensen out of here now.”

She nods and assists Jensen off of the bed. He seems to be in a daze of his own as he refuses to acknowledge any of the others. It was decided that Jensen would stay with Christian and Steve for the time being. Danneel said she would stay with them as well. This way Jensen has as much protection as he can get. Jared wanted him to stay at his place but Chad pointed out that with Jared being a doctor, Jensen would be left alone a good majority of the time. Even if Danneel stayed with them she would still be no match if Tom decided to show up. With the current set up Jensen would never be alone and would always have at least two people there with him.

* * *

 

Jared may not have been able to have Jensen stay with him, but he makes it a point to check up at least once a week. He stops over there as often as his schedule will allow because he’s worried about Tom showing up. He’s the only one big enough to really hold Tom off but after two weeks the other man still hasn’t shown. Things finally calm down and Jared as well as the others are finally able to relax. Jensen recovers fully from his surgery and builds a routine with his housemates. He doesn’t have a job yet but he tries to help around the house to make up for it. It goes on like this for about another month before Jared’s work schedule gets thrown for a loop. One of the other doctors was let go due to theft of various drugs and until they find a replacement, Jared and all the other doctors have to work overtime to make up for it. He doesn’t get the chance to see any of his friends for nearly three weeks. This is also including Chad since they’re always on different shifts nowadays. Once everything dies down he is lucky enough to have two solid days off. He uses the first day to catch up on all of the sleep he’s missed. The second day he plans on going over to Christian’s place. He is dumbfounded by the news he is greeted with.

“What do you mean, he’s gone?”

Danneel is the one who answers over her cup of coffee.

“Tom showed up about a week ago begging forgiveness, claiming it wouldn’t happen again. I mean, he was even crying for fuck’s sake. We begged Jensen not to believe it but he said that he owed it to Tom to give him another chance.”

“What the hell?! How many chances does he give before he finally gets killed?! Why didn’t you guys call me?!”

“We tried, Jared, but with you always on call at the hospital, we were unable to get through.”

“Well, have you talked to Jensen since he left?”

“His cell goes straight to voicemail. When we try the landline it either goes to the machine or Tom answers and won’t let us talk to Jensen. We tried going over there but got no answer when we knocked.”

“Damn it!”

They spend the rest of the afternoon talking and waiting for Christian and Steve to get home so they could come up with another plan of action.


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am so sorry this took so long to update and that it isn't as long as some of the other chapters. I will try to update the next chapter sooner. Thanks for your patience!

Jared and Christian head over to the hospital so they can talk to Chad and Jeff. Jared knows they kept all of the evidence from Jensen’s previous hospital visits and they’ve decided to finally go to the police. Jeff manages to make copies so that the original files won’t be compromised. With Tom’s connections, he wouldn’t be surprised if the evidence disappeared. It takes a week but they finally get word that Tom was arrested and charged with misdemeanor domestic abuse. Unfortunately the judge that was assigned had known Tom previously on some of his cases and stated that since Tom had no previous arrests or charges in either the case of abuse or even for a parking ticket he wasn’t charged with a felony. Also unfortunately Tom is rich enough that he was able to post his own bail within a week of being arrested. In the time he was arrested Jared and the others still tried getting through to Jensen to no avail. All calls and other forms of contact were refused though they did get confirmation from the landlord that Jensen was in fact okay. The case ends up dropped because Jensen refuses to press charges against Tom and the others are left wondering what else they could possibly do. They all continue to fight the case over the next couple of months but can’t make any headway. Jared’s nearing the end of a double shift one night when he gets paged to the E.R. He rushes into the room and sees they are already working on the patient.

“What’ve we got?”

One of the nurses step aside and a paramedic replies.

“Caucasian male, early to mid-thirties. Appears to be a domestic violence case. Neighbors called in a disturbance but the perpetrator wasn’t on scene by the time the cops arrived. He was unconscious when we got there and he hasn’t regained it yet. His heart stopped twice in the ambulance on the way over and he’s stopped breathing multiple times already. He didn’t have any form of I.D. on him when we picked him up but there are still officers at the apartment.”

When Jared finally gets a good look at the patient’s face he feels like his heart has stopped. The nurses had already intubated him and hooked him up to a respirator since he had quit breathing but even through the bruises Jared has no doubt that he is looking at Jensen. He continues to work on the other man while he barks out orders for someone to document the injuries and take pictures of the damage. They also alert Jeffrey Morgan who is luckily on call tonight as well. By the time they finally have him stable and set up in a private room with security standing outside, several hours have passed and Jared was supposed to have been home already. They have done several tests including x-rays and cat scans and discover that there is severe brain swelling due to blunt force trauma. Jared makes the necessary calls to Christian and the others and then joins Jeff as he gathers the new evidence to present to the cops. Jared leaves Jeff with the cops when a receptionist informs him the others have finally shown up. He walks into the room to see Christian, Steve, Danneel and Chad staring in shock at the man they had tried to save. Christian sits at his side grasping his hand. Danneel stands quietly at his side with a hand on his shoulder with tears falling down her face. The other two just stare in shock. Christian looks up when Jared enters.

“Jay…does he have any chance of coming out of this?”

Jared can see he’s on the verge of tears. He hates the defeated look in those sad eyes.

“Honestly, Christian, I don’t know. He’s sustained a lot of damage. The fact he’s still alive is a miracle in itself. He has a lot of swelling in his skull, partially from the brain swelling but he was also bleeding internally. We’ve got him hooked up to a breathing machine because he stopped breathing on his own. If he does wake up he has a great chance of brain damage.”

“Fuck.”

Christian closes his eyes and lets the tears fall before turning back to the man in the bed. Chad approaches Jared.

“Hypothetically speaking, say he does come out of this…what kind of brain damage are you and Jeff expecting?”

Jared sighs and turns to his blonde friend.

“It’s bad. Until the swelling goes down and he wakes up we have no way of knowing how bad, but Jeff has seen this kind of severe swelling before. He said that even if Jensen wakes up he could end up being an invalid.”

Christian curses suddenly and stands up with enough force to topple his chair over.

“I’ve gotta go get some fresh air.”

He storms out of the room while the others contemplate Jensen’s situation.

 

 

* * *

 

A few weeks have passed by but no word has been received on Tom’s whereabouts. Apparently the cops are having a hard time tracking him down. Jared isn’t so sure they really don’t know where he is, just that they’re maybe not saying. Unfortunately, until they do find him there’s nothing to be done. Jared decides that they need a night out. They have all been running themselves ragged with worry and he’s afraid they won’t be able to keep it up for much longer. Christian is the only one to take him up on it. Steve and Danneel head to their homes and Chad has to work a midnight shift. They hit up a couple of bars but end up back at the bar where Jared first met Jensen. Right as they approach the door they hear a scuffle in the alley. When they turn the corner they see Tom standing with a stranger looking like they’re ready to go at it right there. Jared hears Christian growl out beside him as they walk closer. Jared calls out and startles the other two men.

“Tom! Where the hell have you been? Cops have been looking everywhere for you. Are you going to beat this guy senseless like you did Jensen?”

Tom jerks away from the other man and looks like he’s about to go after Jared when suddenly Christian charges him. Before Jared knows it they’re in a head to head brawl.

 

 

* * *

 

Jeffrey was just sitting down after a hard night at the hospital when his phone rang. He sighed and wondered what the people at the hospital couldn’t handle without him for a few hours. He frowned at the caller i.d. because he didn’t recognize the number. He was curious as to who would be calling this late. He looked at the clock and saw it was well past midnight. He answers before the machine picks up and is surprised to hear Jared’s voice.

“Jeff? Hey, it’s Jared. I hate to call you so late but, um…I’ve kind of got myself into a situation.”

“Jay? What’s going on? Are you okay?”

He hears a chuckle before Jared’s voice comes back.

“Yeah we’re okay. Can’t say the same for Tom though.”

Jeff thinks over those words for a moment before hesitantly asking.

“Who’s we? And what are you talking about with Tom?”

“Well me and Chris needed a night on the town and we kind of ran into Tom outside of one of the bars. Long story short, I kind of need you to come bail us out.”

“Bail you out? Jared…what did you do?”

“We uh…we got into it with Tom. He didn’t exactly come out on top, you know?”

There’s an awkward silence before Jared realizes what he just said.

“Wait! Don’t worry, we didn’t kill him or anything like that. Honestly, we weren’t expecting to see him there. It just kind of happened.”

They end the call with Jared telling him where he and Christian were being held. He gets to the police station and pays both their bail after hearing from the cops what exactly happened. He’s led to the holding cell and just stares at Jared and Christian for a few minutes as the police officer opens the cell door. Jared gives him a sheepish grin as he and Christian step out of the cell, both looking worse for wear.

“So, Jay, you beat the shit out of Tom?”

Jared looks down in shame as Christian grins and finally speaks.

“You bet your ass we did! Fucker didn’t get nearly as bad as he deserved but we got him pretty good.”

Jeff rolls his eyes as he leads them out of the station. Apparently they had beaten Tom bad enough that he was rushed to the hospital. He’s still conscious but he suffered a concussion, several broken ribs and a fractured forearm.


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Once again, I am soooo sorry this took so long! I don't know when my next update will be, but I hope this will hold you until then. As usual, thanks for all the kudos and comments! They are always appreciated!

Once Tom healed from all of his injuries he was arrested and charged with aggravated assault.  There were times when Jared thought it would never end. He along with several other members of the hospital was called in to testify as to the injuries Jensen had been treated for not only from the last altercation but also from his previous hospital visits. Jeff’s documentation and proof were taken in as evidence and Christian and Steve were called to testify to the previous incidents between Jensen and Tom. Luckily, the judge put on the case was one that was very strict when it came to ruling on cases of domestic violence and handed out a twenty year sentence with no chance of parole and bail was denied. When all was said and done, several months had gone by. Everything settled down and finally about a week after the sentencing, Jensen started breathing on his own and was removed from the respirator. He gradually came back into consciousness but was unable to stay awake for longer than a few minutes at a time. Eventually he was able to stay awake long enough to start speaking to the staff and Jared was relieved to find him awake once he clocked in for his shift. Christian and the others had wanted to see Jensen ever since he had come off of the machines but because Jensen was still classified as critical only hospital staff was allowed in his room. Even though Jensen had been gradually staying awake longer, nobody had really had the chance to speak with him yet to evaluate him. Chad follows Jared into the room and watches as Jared starts speaking to him.

“Hey, Jensen. It’s good to see you’re finally awake. How are you feeling?”

Jensen frowns up at him and the other two can tell he’s still mildly disoriented. They can also see that he is fidgety. He looks back and forth nervously from Jared to Chad a couple of times before leveling his gaze to the tall doctor. His voice wavers slightly when he finally speaks.

“Who are you?”

The grin Jared had been wearing falters before he glances at Chad. He turns back to the man in the bed and replies.

“You don’t remember me? Your friend Christian set us up on a blind date a while back.”

He watches as Jensen’s eyes trail down his body and back up. If he didn’t know any better he’d swear Jensen was checking him out.

“You’re my boyfriend?”

Jared hesitates, unsure how he should answer the question. He doesn’t want to lie but he also wants to know how much Jensen actually remembers to evaluate how much damage was done.

“Jensen…what’s the last thing you remember?”

Jensen finally looks around the room and frowns as he slowly realizes he is most likely in a hospital. His head is still somewhat fuzzy and he turns back to the vaguely familiar man before him.

“Where am I? This is a hospital, isn’t it?”

“Yes…Jensen…do you recognize either one of us? Like, at all?”

Jensen frowns as he once again looks at both of the men. He feels like he should know them but he just can’t quite place it. Then he thinks back to something the doctor said previously.

“Wait…you said Chris set us up?”

Jared frowns and answers.

“Yeah. He thought we’d make a good pair.”

Jensen thinks back and tries to figure out what is going on. He remembers bits here and there but he was under the impression they still weren’t speaking.

“But why? How does he know you? And why am I in here? Where’s Tom? Chris knows not to try anything like that.”

Jared can see him starting to panic and levels him with an intense stare that Jensen can’t take so he turns away.

“Jensen…Chris tried setting us up about a year ago. Are you telling me that you don’t remember anything from the last year?”

That startles Jensen into looking up.

“But…last year...Who are you? Why are you doing this? A year ago that asshole that’s supposed to be my best friend slammed the damn door in my face when I needed him most!”

Jared holds his hands up and tries calming the other man down.

“Jensen, I need you to calm down and just listen to me. My name is Jared, I’m a doctor here. Christian tried setting us up on a date about a year ago but it didn’t exactly work out.”

Jensen snorts and starts messing with the blanket covering his legs.

“So I guess you’re just like everybody else. They never wanted me either. I thought Chris did, but he only played me.”

Jared puts his arms down and frowns.

“Jensen, what are you talking about?”

Jensen looks up at him with tear filled eyes.

“My parents kicked me out of the house when I was seventeen…”

Jared interrupts before the other man can continue.

“Wait…I thought you were kicked out when you were fifteen.”

“No, I came out to my parents when I was fifteen. They didn’t kick me out of the house until after senior year started.”

Jared opens and closes his mouth trying to voice his question.

“But Chris said you were kicked out after you told your parents you were gay and that his family took you in.”

Jensen reaches up to wipe away a few tears that had fallen.

“Well, of course he did. It sounds better for him that way.”

“What are you talking about?”

“I begged Chris to let me move in with him in the beginning but he shut the door in my face. I was the only one in our school to come out at the time and he wasn’t comfortable having me over there anymore. I don’t even think he bothered to ask his parents. The only reason they finally let me move in was because my family had gotten so abusive over it that he finally got the balls to tell his parents what was going on. His dad was iffy but his mom said yes instantly. It was awkward between Chris and me for several years after I came out. That’s why I moved in with Tom so soon after we started dating. It wasn’t until Chris started seeing the bruises that he pulled his head out of his ass and really started caring. I don’t know, I guess he felt guilty for treating me like I had leprosy instead of just being gay. I was with Tom for about four years the first time.”

Jared is at a loss for words so Chad finally steps forward.

“Jensen? My name is Chad, I’m a nurse here.”

Jensen looks at him warily and gets a small grin.

“Don’t you mean ‘murse’? You know, male nurse?”

Chad grins back and steps slowly towards the bed.

“Yeah, I guess I am a murse…how many times have you been with Tom?”

“Well, we were together four years the first time. I think there was a two or three year gap we were broken up and we’ve been back together now for about two years. I was nineteen when I met him.”

“So that puts you about twenty-eight years old?”

Jensen just nods his head while Jared and Chad share a look. In talking to Christian, Jared knows that Jensen is actually thirty-one years old, meaning that the man in the bed has lost about three years of memory. They both look back to Jensen as Chad continues.

“Has Tom hit you the entire time?”

Jensen’s eyes widened momentarily before looking back down at the bed. He shrugs his shoulders before answering quietly.

“He doesn’t mean it. I shouldn’t talk back to him. He works hard and I don’t make it easy on him. He always apologizes later and makes it up to me.”

Jared has to take a deep breath to calm himself down before speaking.

“Jensen, I hate to tell you this but you need to know. The reason you’re here is because of Tom. The time period you’re talking about was three years ago. When Chris set us up, you had been broken up from Tom for two years already. You’ve been in the hospital for about six months now. He beat you so bad that we didn’t think you’d make it. Your heart stopped a few times and you quit breathing on your own. You were in a coma until about a month ago when you started breathing on your own again and started waking up.”

They wait quietly as that registers with the abused man. He slowly looks up at Jared and fresh tears start falling.

“If I’m not with Tom anymore…then why didn’t we get along? Did I do something wrong?”

Jared is at a loss over the difference in attitude Jensen has. This Jensen is so open and emotional that he almost feels like he’s going to break down as well.

“No, Jensen, you didn’t do anything wrong. You did what you were supposed to do…but I was kind of an ass. I got held up here and didn’t try getting a message to you that I would be late. When I finally showed up we got into it and I guess I’ve been taking it out on you when you didn’t deserve it.”

Jensen looks back down and thinks a moment before speaking again.

“So where’s Tom now?”

Jensen looks back up and Jared now realizes how bad the other man is shaking. It occurs to him that Jensen is scared to death right as Jensen continues to speak.

“I don’t want him to hurt me anymore. I don’t like being hit. Please don’t let him in here!”

Jared rushes over to the bed and pulls the panicking man to him to try to calm him down. He wraps his arms around him as the other man whimpers and starts sobbing into his shirt.

“Ssh, Jensen, it’s okay. He can’t hurt you anymore. While you were sleeping, we were all working hard to get him put behind bars. He’s going away for a long time; you don’t have to worry about him anymore.”

He just sits with Jensen on the bed for a while as the other man gradually calms down. Eventually he falls asleep leaning against Jared so Chad quietly leaves the room and shuts the door behind him. Jared knows that this is technically inappropriate but he doesn’t care. Jensen has been through a lot and he is worried that he will wake the other man if he moves so he decides to make himself comfortable and wait for the other man to wake back up.


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok, I am sure you all are getting tired of my apologies and excuses! I didn't realize how long it's been since I last updated and I am so sorry! I've been having a hard time getting motivated to write the next chapter. I also had a couple of new ideas that I have added into this chapter. I really hope you like it and I am sorry it's not very long, but I wanted to go ahead and post something before I continued. I hope you enjoy this and I thank you all for your continued support!

The hospital decides to keep Jensen for a couple of more weeks to make sure he is physically and emotionally ready to be released. It's been several days since Jensen's outburst and Jared has another day off. He's just finished washing the lunch dishes when his cell rings. He answers and is met with the voice of a panicked Chad.

"Dude! You have to get your ass up here now!"

Jared stops in his tracks and replies.

"Chad? What's going on? What happened?"

"Well, for one, that dipshit new doctor decided to allow Jensen visitors and escorted both Christian and Steve into the room!"

Jared frowns for a moment trying to see the problem.

"Yeah? And? He’s known Chris and Steve for years. They never hit him that I know of."

"Jared you dumbass! You probably didn't realize it because you and I have been the main ones seeing Jensen, but apparently the Jensen from three years ago was scared to death of other men because of Tom's beatings! That includes Chris and Steve. Doctor Dipshit practically burst into his room and announced Christian and Steve being there and Jensen totally flipped out!"

Jared curses and makes a mad dash for his shoes and keys while Chad continues.

"He's been freaking out for the last thirty minutes asking for you. He won't even let me near him! We had to kick Chris and Steve out, which, by the way was damn hard. I was afraid we were going to have to call in security to force them out. The dumbass doctor is sitting in Jeff's office right now awaiting disciplinary action. We have a few of the other female nurses and Dr. McNiven is here to try to calm him down."

Jared finally gets his shoes on and is out the door and in his car in record time.

“Who the hell gave him authorization to allow visitors?! I already told Chris that we weren’t letting anyone see him yet because we didn’t know how he’d react. Hell, he’s still getting used to you coming into the room with me.”

“I know, Jay. That’s why Dr. McNiven was paged. We were hoping that she’d be able to calm him down so we wouldn’t have to call you in. He won’t even let her near him. I’m telling you, man, you gotta get here. Like, now!”

“I know! I’m on my way.”

Jared's nearly halfway to the hospital already and so far has been lucky to not run into any cops. He thinks over what Chad has just said and frowns again.

"Wait, who did you page?"

"Dr. McNiven. Remember? She's the one Jeff had transferred over a while back because of her experience with abuse cases. Jamie or something? Starts with a 'J'."

Suddenly it hits Jared.

"Julie. Julie McNiven. Jeff had her come over last year when we had that little girl who wouldn't talk to anybody. Remember? Her mother had passed away and the father couldn't cope or something."

"Yeah, well regardless, she's not having any luck getting through to him. She thinks he's suffering post-traumatic stress or something. He's cowering in the corner and flips when anybody gets too close to him. Are you almost here?"

"Yeah. I'm about five minutes out, ten tops."

They hang up so that Jared can focus on not crashing in his rush to get to Jensen.

 

* * *

 

 

When Jared finally gets there, he is ushered up to Jensen's room. He enters slowly so as to not startle the abused man. He starts speaking quietly.

"Jensen? Hey, it's Jared. It's okay, nobody's going to hurt you. Can I sit down next to you?"

He barely has the chance to squat near the other man when all of a sudden his arms are full of a sobbing and frantic man.

"Jay! Please, don't let them in here! Don't let them hurt me, please!"

Jared struggles to keep his balance since Jensen had practically slammed into him. He quickly kneels onto his knees to keep them from toppling over. Jensen starts whimpering as Jared wraps his arms around him and starts shushing him. Jensen is getting as close as he possibly can so Jared pulls Jensen into his lap.

"Hey, ssh, it's okay. I'm not going to let anybody hurt you. You're safe here."

Jensen just clings tighter as he replies.

"No I'm not! That huge guy came in...and...and Chris and Steve were there but they won't help! They shouldn't have been in here! You said nobody else was supposed to be in here!"

Jared starts rubbing his back.

"Calm down, Jensen, it's alright now. That doctor is still new and he had no excuse for allowing visitors when you're not ready."

"I'm not! I'm not ready! Please don't let anyone in here! I don't want to hurt anymore!"

"Easy, Jensen. As long as I'm around, nobody's going to hurt you ever again."

They sit quietly for a few minutes as Jensen slowly comprehends that Jared is truly there. Once Jensen has finally calmed down enough he is able to pull back just enough to look Jared in the eye.

"You promise?"

Jared nods and kisses his forehead.

"Yeah, I promise. I swear, Jensen, nobody's ever going to be able to hurt you again. They'll have to go through me first."

Jensen grins slightly before leaning back into Jared.

"Yeah, and you're pretty huge. You're like a sasquatch."

Jared chuckles and squeezes Jensen tighter.

"Yeah, I guess you could say that."

They sit there quietly for a few more minutes as Jared motions that it's okay for everybody else to leave. A woman in a white coat stays behind. She has deep red hair and a pale complexion. She clears her throat and speaks quietly while she kneels on the floor as well.

"So, you're the amazing Dr. Padalecki I keep hearing about."

By this time, Jensen is nearly dozing in Jared's lap so he replies in a quiet voice as well.

"Yeah, though I wouldn't say amazing."

She snorts and gives him a knowing grin.

"Trust me. I've worked with abuse victims for years. I don't know what you did or how you did it, but he trusts you. More than anybody else it looks like."

Jared shrugs his shoulders.

"Yeah, well, I knew him before all of this. When he woke back up...it was just easy to open up to him. I didn't expect him to trust me the way he does, though."

"Well, whatever you're doing, it's working. I'm Julie McNiven, by the way. It's nice to finally meet you."

"Likewise. Jared Padalecki, though you know that by now."

He blushes slightly before continuing the conversation.

"So, how did you come to specializing in abuse cases?"

"I did it for my older brother, Misha. You see, our mother remarried a few times, had children with a couple of them. Her last husband was great with me and our brothers but for some reason he singled out Misha. He was both verbally and physically abusive. I was too little to stand up for him and mother was usually too drunk to worry about it. I had an inheritance from my father who had passed away when I was little. Once I was old enough to collect it, I left with Misha. I went to school to become a doctor and here I am."

"Oh my god, that's terrible that you had to go through that! How is he now? Is he okay?"

She sighs and looks down for a moment before answering.

"I guess that depends on your definition of 'okay'. Compared to the average person walking down the street, no. But compared to where he started, he is doing wonderfully. Unfortunately, he was left with a fear of leaving the house in addition to meeting new people. I try to get him out of the house at least once a month. Sometimes I succeed, sometimes I don't. No matter what kind of day he's having though, I'm just thankful I got him out of there before it got any worse. I can't even imagine what it would be like to lose him forever."

They sit quietly for several more minutes just listening to Jensen's deep breathing. Eventually, she helps Jared get Jensen back into the bed and get him resettled for the night. Jared sits in a chair beside the bed and thinks about how he got to this point with Jensen. He thinks about how just changing one thing that night might have changed everything there had been between the two. They may have hit it off and been in a much better place by now. Jensen shouldn’t have had to deal with everything he went through. Jared makes a silent promise that he will do anything in his power to make it up to the other man.


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Once again, I am so sorry this is taking so long for me to update! I know I say that a lot but I hope this chapter was better than the last one and that it makes up for the long time in between updates. As always, I want to thank all of my loyal readers for being patient and continuing to read this! You guys help to keep me motivated and I appreciate every one of you!

Christian is pacing up and down the waiting room while Steve sits in one of the uncomfortable plastic chairs. They both look up when Chad approaches. The blonde man doesn't even get a chance to speak before Christian practically launches himself at him.

“Hey! What the hell was that?! One minute we're allowed to see him and now suddenly we're not?!”

Chad steps closer with his hands up trying to calm down the other man.

“Chill out man. That doctor wasn't even supposed to let you in there.”

“Why the hell not? I think I deserve to see him! He's my fucking best friend and I want back in there now! Give me one good reason why I can't go in!”

Chad is starting to lose his patience.

“Because he doesn't want to see you.”

He almost regrets the words as soon as they're out when he sees the look on Christian’s face.

“What do you mean he doesn't want to see me?”

Chad sighs and motions for them to sit. He knows that Jared had been filtering what he told them and that they don't know about the amnesia. At least, they don't know how bad it is. They're under the impression that it's just mild short term memory loss.

“Chris...Jensen's memory loss spans back three years. Me and Jared are really the only men that have been going into his room. I didn't know him three years ago, but he has a different personality now than when I first met him. He's reserved, nervous...he seems to trust Jay and me but he's still wary when we enter the room. The first thing he said when Jared got here was that nobody but me and him were supposed to go in there. He's scared to death that someone's going to hurt him again. The day he first woke up he begged us not to let Tom in there because he didn't want to get hit. He's got a lot of hurt and fears locked away that he's been avoiding for years. This Jensen, though, has been open and honest regardless of how scared he is. I know you want to see him, but we have to take this at Jensen's pace. He deserves that much after everything else.”

They sit for several minutes while that sinks in. Steve finally speaks up after having been silent for so long.

“So, does he have any other brain damage? I mean aside from the amnesia.”

Chad looks over at him and is thankful to have some good news at last.

“No. From what we've been able to gather the amnesia is the only thing. All of his motor skills, vision, everything has come back fine so far. The memory is the only thing we've found since he woke up.”

Chris speaks up again.

“So how long until we can see him? I mean, I've known him my whole life. I never beat the crap out of him. Why is he scared of me?”

“How did he act with you a few years ago? When he first woke up he said that you had slammed the door in his face. He said it was a year ago, which in his mind was when he was twenty seven. Do you know what he was talking about?”

Christian thinks back for several minutes and is about to reply in the negative when it finally hits him.

“Shit.”

He rubs his hands down his face and takes a few minutes before answering.

“Yeah, I know what he was talking about. We got into it about Tom. Again. I was ranting at him, trying to convince him to leave that sorry excuse for a human and he pissed me off by defending him. Can you believe that? The man that had been beating him daily. We didn't talk for about a year after that. I told him that if he couldn't come back without Tom that he'd better not come back at all.”

Chad thinks about that momentarily before deciding on his next words.

“Well, he's under the impression that you're still pissed at him. That might be part of the reason he's scared to have you in there. As far as when you can see him, that's gotta be up to him. When he does feel up to it, we'll just have you go in one at a time and most likely Jay or I will be there too. If he trusts me, he trusts Jay even more. Jared's talking to Dr. McNiven right now. She specializes in abuse cases and we're hoping that she can help Jensen to start healing from his post-traumatic stress.”

They sit there quietly for a while before Chad gets called away to assist one of the other doctors.

 

* * *

 

They decide to let things settle down for a few days before trying to allow Chris into Jensen's room. Julie and Jared have both been working with Jensen to get him used to the idea of Chris coming in. He's still really nervous but they finally have him agreeing to see his longtime friend. Jared and Julie are standing near the bed while Chad ushers Christian in. Jensen looks up as he enters and starts fidgeting with the blanket over his lap. Christian sits down in one of the chairs beside the bed and starts speaking quietly. He can see how spooked Jensen is and it brings back bad flashbacks that he had hoped he'd never have to relive.

“Hey, Jen. How are you feeling?”

Jensen shrugs his shoulders and drops his gaze.

“I'm okay. Are you still mad at me?”

Christian slowly reaches over and gently lifts Jensen's chin so they are eye to eye. He sees tears welling up in the other man's eyes.

“No, Jen. I'm not mad at you. I'm just worried. I was afraid you weren't going to wake up.”

A few tears fall unbidden down Jensen's cheek as his voice gets lower. He can't seem to settle his hands.

“I'm sorry.”

“Hey, now don't be sorry, Jen. You haven't done anything wrong. I'm the one that should be sorry. I wasn't there for you when you really needed me and I'm going to do whatever it takes to make it up to you. Anything you need, anything at all, you just ask. Okay?”

Jensen nods his head slowly while keeping his eyes on the other man. Christian finally removes his hand away from Jensen's face and they sit quietly together for a few minutes before Jensen speaks.

“So, Jared said you set us up?”

Christian is taken aback because that is the last thing he expected Jensen to ask.

“Yeah. After Chad introduced us I thought he'd be perfect for you. I just wanted you to meet somebody that was going to be good to you, Jen. You know I hate seeing you hurt.”

“I know. I'm sorry.”

Christian huffs a small laugh.

“Quit apologizing. You are probably the only person in this whole damn mess that hasn't done anything wrong and you're the first one jumping to apologize. Jen, everything I said before...all that happened between us...that's all on me. None of it was your fault. I've been an ass for longer than I care to admit and you didn't deserve any of the shit I was laying on you. My biggest regret is that I didn't get you away from that abusive asshole years ago.”

Jensen doesn't know what to say to that so he just looks back down at his lap. Eventually the doctors deem visiting hours over and insist that Jensen needs to rest some more. Before leaving, Christian vows to come back everyday to visit until Jensen is discharged.

 

* * *

 

After Jensen is finally discharged, he moves in with Jared because he is too anxious to stay anywhere else. Christian tries to convince him to stay with he and Steve but that argument ends in Jensen shivering and apologizing so he finally relents. He does, however, make it a point to still visit Jensen at Jared's place several times a week to try to get to know him again. He is also trying to get Jensen to trust him and Steve again. They keep this going for a few weeks after Jensen's release from the hospital before Jared and Julie think it's time for a certain meet and greet. Jensen is extremely anxious about meeting someone new but he trusts Jared's judgement. They're standing outside Julie's door and Jensen's grip is so tight that Jared fears he will soon lose feeling in his fingers. He knocks on the door and only wait a few minutes before it is opened and Julie is standing in front of them with a welcoming smile. She ushers them in and shows them to the living room. Jared gently squeezes the other man's hand to reassure him when they hear a quiet commotion in the other room. After several minutes pass, Julie comes back into the room with a ruggedly handsome man following with a scowl on his face.

“Jared, Jensen? This is my brother Misha.”

Jared steps forward with his hand outstretched.

“Hi, I'm Jared. It's nice to meet you.”

Misha has black hair and deep blue eyes and he glares at the hand momentarily before meeting Jared's gaze. He makes no other move so Jared awkwardly drops his hand and motions to the man standing beside him.

“Um, yeah, so this is Jensen.”

Jensen fights back a flinch when those blue eyes meet his green ones. He takes half a step back and starts whispering to Jared.

“Jay, I want to go. Please? I don't think he wants us here.”

Misha scoffs at that as Julie finally steps forward and levels a glare at her brother.

“I'm so sorry, guys. I should have warned you that Misha can be a little...standoffish..when it comes to strangers.”

Before she can continue, Misha rolls his eyes and interrupts.

“Standoffish? You know I hate meeting new people. Why the hell did you invite them anyway? That one looks like he's about five seconds from pissing himself.”

They all startle when that actually gets a reaction out of Jensen.

“Hey! I don't know who the hell you think you are, but I am not a little kid that's just going to 'piss himself' because somebody looks at me funny!”

They all stare at him for a few minutes before Jensen realizes that he actually spoke out. He blushes deeply and looks at all of their faces, especially noting the smirk on Misha's face before dropping his gaze. He seems to shrink into himself as he speaks in a quieter tone.

“I'm sorry.”

Before anyone else can speak, however, Misha barks out a harsh laugh.

“Sorry? I was just starting to respect you and you end it by apologizing?”

Julie pushes him slightly.

“Misha, that is quite enough! I invited them here because I thought that you and Jensen could get to know each other. I thought you might actually be a little sympathetic towards him and that maybe you two could relate to each other.”

He just snorts and makes his excuse to leave the room.

“I'm going to go set the table. I assume you invited them for dinner and that you won't leave me alone unless I actually make some effort to take part.”

With that he leaves the room leaving Julie to apologize again. Jensen watches him leave in curiosity while he places the dinnerware upon the table. The rest of the evening passes in tense conversation as they try to get the two men to open up more to each other. Misha has no qualms about stating his opinion but Jensen seems too afraid to open his mouth to speak again since his initial outburst. All in all, they deem the night to not be a total loss and decide to try again at a later date.

 


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok, I know it has been FOREVER since I last updated and I am soooooo sorry!!!! I was able to fix the story itself, but then I was hit with one of the worst writer's blocks of my life! I couldn't get motivated to type a single sentence and you readers have been so great and patient about it! I hope this chapter will make up for my absence.

Misha watched as Julie shut the door behind their guests at the end of the night. He sighs and rolls his eyes when she turns a glare on him.

"Don't give me that look."

"I just don't get it. Would it really kill you to be nice? They didn't do anything to you and I know for a fact that Jensen could really use a friend right now."

"Oh, really? Cause it looks to me like he has one."

"I mean someone who can relate. He's had a hard time too. Don't you think it's time for you to, I don't know, actually do something instead of sitting around here day after day? I know what you went through was awful, but you're not the only one that has been hurt like that. Jensen didn't want to come over here..."

"Well that makes two of us."

Julie sighs and rubs her temples.

"You won't ever get better if you don't try. Is this really how you want to spend your life?"

He gives her a hard glare as he stands up.

"No, this isn't how I wanted to spend my life. Thanks for asking."

He turns to head to his room as Julie calls out to him.

"Misha, wait! I'm sorry!"

She is answered with the slam of his bedroom door. She sighs and starts to clean up from dinner before heading to bed herself. Down the hall, Misha gets ready for bed and slides under the covers, desperately trying to get comfortable. Sleep eludes him as he ponders the evening's events. Maybe Julie was right. Should he have tried being more polite to the other man? He had been pleasantly surprised at the spark that he saw in the other man's eyes when he was upset. Plus, he was very aesthetically pleasing. His eyes were an interesting shade of green with a hint of hazel and his facial structure was very fitting to his physique. He finally drifts off to the vision of green eyes and freckles.

* * *

 

Jared has had his hours reduced at the hospital so that he can focus more on Jensen's recovery. Over the next several weeks, they work on getting Jensen to open up and Misha to say anything that’s not an insult. On one particular night, Jensen and Misha are left alone in the living room so that Jared and Julie can talk.

“How does Jensen seem to be doing with these visits? Have you noticed any improvement?”

Jared sighs and runs his hands through his hair.

“Not really. He’s still really anxious when we go out in public. I think he’s been having nightmares, too. He cries in the middle of the night and has panic attacks. When I wake him up, he refuses to tell me what he was dreaming. He claims he doesn't remember but the next day he’s more hesitant around me than he had been. It takes him the better part of the morning to warm back up to me and it has me concerned.”

“Maybe he just has a hard time expressing himself after having a nightmare. The best thing you can do is to be there for him. I’m sure he’ll get better with his nightmares, especially if you can get him to talk about them.”

"I'll keep trying but the longer this goes on, the more I think that he's intentionally keeping something from me."

She reaches over and squeezes his forearm in a kind gesture.

"You'll get him there. You just have to be patient."

While they continue to talk, Jensen and Misha are sitting awkwardly in the living room. Jensen is unnerved by the intense stare being leveled at him from the other man. It finally gets to be too much and he snaps.

"Would you knock it off?!"

The other man just grins and acts innocent when he replies.

"I don't know what you're talking about."

Jensen stands up to put some space between them.

"You know damn well what I'm talking about. What's with all the staring? It's creepy as hell and you need to stop."

Misha's grin turns wider as he replies.

"I find you...intriguing. I've never met anyone like you."

"I'm not surprised considering you never leave your place. Even if you did I bet you still wouldn't have any friends. You're rude, stuck up and arrogant!"

He meant the words to be hurtful but Misha appears even more amused than previously. That just makes Jensen even madder.

"What the hell is wrong with you?! I'm insulting you and you find it funny?"

"You'll have to excuse me, but I am not laughing at your silly insults. This is the first I've seen you show any real personality since the first night you came over. Getting you riled up is the only way I can see into your soul so to speak. I'd rather have you yelling at me than look at the broken shell of a person that you appear to be. Besides, it's fun seeing you get all hot and bothered."

Jensen has no response so he just scowls at that and sits back down, albeit a little further away than he had been. They sit there quietly for several more minutes while Misha continues to watch the other man, studying him. Jensen glances at him nervously.

"What?!"

Misha purses his lips a moment as if picking his words.

"You're hiding something."

Jensen's breath hitches and he turns his eyes away from the intense blue stare aimed at him.

"I'm not hiding anything. I don't even remember anything. Or did you forget that with our first introductions?"

Misha reaches over slowly to stop Jensen's suddenly fidgety hands. He scoots over minutely and tries getting Jensen to look up.

"Jensen...what aren't you telling us? I know you're hiding something. I just can't figure out what. Are you starting to remember? Is it something with Jared?"

Jensen looks up sharply at that and pulls his hands away.

"What?! Jared hasn't done anything. He's the one that's been helping me get over whatever happened."

"Then why won't you tell me what's going on? You two have come here several more times since that first visit and Julie may not have noticed it, but the way you act around Jared has changed. Not by much, but the change is there none the less."

Jensen gets up and wipes his now sweaty palms on his jeans.

"I don't know what you're talking about."

Misha sighs and decides to let it go for now.

"Well, if you ever decide to talk about it, you can talk to me."

Jensen just nods slightly and turns a challenging look on Misha.

"So, what happened to you? Why won't you leave the house?"

For once, the other man's expression gets closed off.

"I was not...treated well..growing up. If it hadn't been for Julie getting me out, I don't think I'd have got out alive."

Before any more can be said, he gets up and walks down the hall to his bedroom. His door is slammed and Jensen involuntarily flinches at the sound. Jared and Julie come out of the kitchen at the sound and look over at Jensen. He turns his eyes to the floor and walks slowly over to Jared. He offers no explanation and requests that they leave now. Confused by what has transgressed, Jared gives in and takes Jensen back to the apartment without questioning Jensen about what happened.

* * *

 

They decide to get into a routine of meeting once per week and carry on the next several weeks of Jared and Julie talking in the kitchen and leaving Jensen and Misha in the living room. On one particular night before they are to meet up with Misha and Julie, Jared is woken out of a sound sleep to Jensen screaming. Jared runs down the hall to Jensen's bedroom. He gets there and sees Jensen flailing on the bed tangled up in the blankets. He's crying and screaming but Jared can't make out what he's actually saying. Jared finally gets him awake and narrowly avoids getting a punch to the face before Jensen is scrambling out of bed to hunch up in the corner. Jared rushes over to him but is halted by Jensen's rough voice. 

"Don't touch me!"

Jared backs up at the wild look in the other man's eyes and holds his hands up, palms out. 

"Okay, easy Jensen. It's just me. I'm not going to touch you if you don't want me to." 

"I don't, I really don't!" 

"Okay. It's okay, just try to calm down. Take deep breaths, nobody's going to hurt you. You're safe here." 

He sits back and just watches the traumatized man, not liking the wild look he keeps receiving. Jensen is sitting curled up with his arms wrapped around his legs and he won't take his eyes off of Jared. He looks like a cornered feral animal and Jared's concern ratchets up another notch. In all of the nightmares that he has woken Jensen from, the other man has never looked at him like that. 

"Hey, can you tell me what you were dreaming? It might help if you talk about it." 

Jensen frantically shakes his head. 

"No, I don't remember...don't remember." 

Jared realizes the other man is slightly rocking himself, still keeping his eyes on Jared. Over the course of the next hour, Jensen gradually calms down until he's just a sweaty, shivering mess. Jared's concerned the other man may be going into shock when Jensen finally starts speaking. 

"I'm sorry...I don't know what happened, I just...I don't know. I'm sorry I woke you up." 

Jared nods his head although he's not sure what he's agreeing to. 

"It's okay. You didn't do anything wrong. Do you want anything? I can make you some tea or something if you still need a bit to calm down." 

Jensen's already shaking his head no before Jared finishes. 

"No, thanks. I just want to go back to bed. Forget this happened." 

Jared frowns at that. 

"Jensen, I think you need to talk about this. Bottling it up like that isn't healthy." 

Jensen glares at Jared and the taller man is taken aback at how similar it is to the looks Jensen gave him prior to his last assault from Tom. 

"How the hell would you know?! You don't really give a damn, you just feel sorry for me because I'm broken! Besides, I already told you, I don't remember! I don't know what I was dreaming so get off my back!"

Jared is stunned at the outburst and slowly stands up and makes his way to the door, keeping his eyes on Jensen. 

"I'm sorry, just calm down, please. I really do care, I want you to get better." 

He stands at the door for a few minutes watching Jensen finish calming down before he decides that he's not going to get anywhere tonight. 

"Look, if you don't need anything, I'm going to go back to bed." 

Jensen doesn't say anything but he nods his head. Jared stands there another minute before leaving and closing the door behind him. He listens outside the door long enough to hear what sounds like Jensen climbing back into the bed. He tosses and turns the rest of the night but thankfully there is no further commotion from Jensen's room. The next day the make their weekly trip to see Julie and Misha and Jared is unnerved by the silence in the car. He realizes that Jensen has barely said anything to him all day. They get to the apartment and are ushered in by Julie who immediately offers them something to drink. Jensen just smiles and declines but Jared follows her into the kitchen so he can talk to her about Jensen's night. They sit at the table with their drinks and Jared doesn't even get a chance to speak before Julie is talking. 

"Okay, what's going on? You both look terrible. Neither of you look like you got any sleep. Did he have more nightmares?" 

Jared sighs and takes a drink of his sweet tea before answering. 

"It was the worst one yet. Once I got him awake, he freaked out and curled up in the corner of his room. He wouldn't let me touch him and claimed he couldn't remember what the dream was about. I swear he looked like a wild animal the way he kept looking at me. I asked him to talk about it and he just yelled at me; told me I can't understand what's going on with him and that I don't care anyway. He hasn't reacted to me like that since he was still with Tom. No matter what I try he just closes up. I don't know if he's dreaming of Tom or what but he won't talk to me." 

They continue talking about different ways they can try to get Jensen to open up. Meanwhile, in the living room, Jensen had watched them go. He turns back to see Misha frowning at him. 

"Did anyone tell you that you look constipated when you frown like that?" 

That gets no reaction so he just sighs and sits down on the couch. After a moment, Misha joins him. 

"You're remembering." 

It's not a question, but Jensen struggles not to answer. Over the months they have been meeting up, he and Misha had been slowly forming a bond that Jensen didn't like to think about too much. It makes him a little uncomfortable to be getting close to another person. He looks at Misha and back down at his hands. After a tense silence he realizes that Misha is expecting a response. Jensen just sighs and refuses to make eye contact while he speaks. 

"I've been having nightmares. Most of them...well, my ex is in a lot of them. Some of them are from before...stuff that happened when I was younger, when we were together the first time. At least, that's how they started. For a while now, I've been dreaming about stuff that I still don't remember but that had to have happened more recently. I've been seeing Jared a lot, and the blonde nurse from the hospital." 

Misha frowns deeper and replies. 

"What are Jared and Blonde Nurse doing in these dreams? Do they hurt you? That would certainly explain your distance from Jared lately." 

Jensen shakes his head and stands up, beginning to pace. 

"No, nothing like that...at least not physically." 

Misha clenches his fists at the implication. 

"What do you mean, 'not physically'?" 

Jensen stops and runs his hands over his face. 

"I don't know, it's still so...confusing. Blonde Nurse..I only ever see concern from him in the dreams." 

He starts pacing again and he is starting to get nervous remembering the dream from last night. Misha stands up and halts the other man. 

"What about Jared? What's he doing in the dream?" 

Jensen looks him in the eyes and Misha can see he's holding back tears. 

"He's..smiling. But it's not a nice smile. It's the smile Tom used to give me when he thought he caught me in a lie, the smile he'd give me right before...well. It's cruel and ugly and it doesn't fit on his face with his dimples and I hate it! I'm frustrated because every time I see that smirk in a dream, I just feel like I've done something wrong, it makes me feel like shit and there's nothing I can do about it! There's never really anything said, it's more feeling and emotions and when I look at Jared in those dreams..." 

He turns away as a few tears fall and he runs his hand through his hair. Misha can barely hear him when he whispers the end of his tirade. 

"When I look at him, all I feel is hurt and hate." 

He looks back over at Misha as the tears keep falling. Misha gently reaches up and wipes them away before pulling Jensen into a hug. The hurt man keeps talking as he quietly cries. 

"And then I wake up and he's there and I'm looking at him, at this man that has done so much for me since I woke up in that hospital and nobody's treated me the way he has been but all I feel when I look at him is hate and I can't stand him touching me then. He wants to comfort me but I can't let him because I feel like if he touches me I'm just going to lose it. I'm going to lash out at him and he doesn't deserve it but at the same time I just want to so bad! I want to lash out, I want to hurt him as bad as I'm hurting and I don't understand it! I'm sick of not remembering everything that happened and he's told me some of before but I can't help but feel like there's something he's not telling me. The longer I'm there at his apartment...I just don't know. I don't know if I can really trust him. Are my dreams really memories or is it my messed up mind projecting the hurt from Tom onto him?" 

They stand there for a few minutes while Jensen calms down. He's holding onto Misha like he's afraid of letting him go. Misha is still holding onto the other man when he starts speaking. 

"Jen...you need to tell Jared." 

Jensen shakes his head and pulls away. He's wiping the remaining tears from his face before he catches what Misha said. 

"Wait, did you just call me 'Jen'?" 

Misha just shrugs his shoulders and doesn't seem bothered at being caught. 

"I've been calling you that in my head for a while so I thought I'd try it out loud." 

Jensen just stands there staring at the other man while a few remaining tears fall. Misha steps closer and wipes the tear tracks away again before pulling the other man into another loose embrace. He gently kisses Jensen on the temple before pulling away again. 

"Seriously, though, I think you need to tell Jared. You need to tell him just as much as he needs to fill in the blanks for you." 

Jensen is still caught off guard by the tenderness Misha was just exhibiting. He collects himself before replying. 

"I know, I'm just not ready yet. If they are memories, I want time to process them myself before talking to Jared about them. I just...I need this to myself for a while. I'm tired of feeling like I'm in the dark about everything and everybody else knows what's going on. I want something that nobody else knows for a while. So, please don't tell anybody." 

Misha sighs and nods his head. 

"Okay, I won't tell. I won't tell as long as you don't keep me in the dark, too. I know we haven't known each other for long, but you're the only one who makes me feel normal. You don't treat me like they do. You don't look at me like I'm broken, so I want to help you. I care about you, Jen." 

Jensen stands there in shock. He knew they had been getting closer, but it wasn't until hearing those words that he realized the feelings were mutual. 

"I care about you too, Mish." 

Misha grins at the shortened version of his name. He hands Jensen a couple of tissues and they sit down to watch some television. A few hours later, Jared and Julie finish up their conversation and head into the living room to announce Jared and Jensen's departure due to the late hour. However, when they enter the room, they discover that Jensen and Misha are leaned into each other sound asleep. Jared feels a slight pang of disappointment at the peaceful expression on Jensen's face and that he's allowing Misha to be so close to him. He only wishes he could have that effect on the other man.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Once again, I am sorry for the late update! I want you all to know that I have already written a pretty decent amount for the next chapter and have a better idea of where to go from here. I will tell you that I hope to finish up the fic in another couple of chapters or so because I really hate leaving you guys hanging and I fear if I don't end it while it's still good I'll run out of ideas and either make it boring or get another writer's block that turns this into an abandoned fic (which I absolutely refuse to let happen. I hate unfinished abandoned fics and couldn't do that to you guys.) So, again sorry for the wait and I hope this chapter is enjoyable to you all!
> 
> Also, a belated apology to the few people who had actually commented under the previous 'Chapter 13', I didn't realize that your kind comments were deleted when I redid this chapter until the next day after I saved it and checked my inbox to reply.


	14. Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am so sorry!!! I know it's been forever and some of you probably thought I abandoned this fic because I've never taken this long to update. For anyone still reading I really appreciate your patience!! I had a large chunk of this chapter written (mainly in 3 chunks) but my muse left me and I could not for the life of me figure out how to connect the parts together to actually form a full chapter. I plan on wrapping this story up as soon as I'm able because it is taking me too long to be able to update and I really hate leaving you guys hanging for an update. I'm afraid this chapter turned out kind of crappy but I guess I won't know for sure until I read your feedback. Thanks again for your patience!!

At Julie's suggestion, they decide to let Jensen sleep over and see what happens. Jared wanted to object but she said that if Jensen was comfortable enough to fall asleep the way he did, it might be good for him to see how it goes. Jared reluctantly leaves at her insistence; he has an early shift at the hospital the next morning. He leaves as Julie quietly wakes her brother. Misha blinks sleepily as he tries to figure out whats going on. He looks up and sees his sister holding a finger to her lips while motioning to the other man on the couch. He looks over to see Jensen is out cold and that Jared is nowhere to be found. Julie is whispering when she answers his query.

"Jared had to leave because he has to get up early for work. I convinced him to let Jensen sleep here since he looks so peaceful. I honestly think it'll be good for him. Good for both of them, really. I think they need a break from each other for a little bit. And this way, Jensen can have company while Jared's at work and maybe you can get him to open up one on one."

He nods his head in understanding as relief washes over him. He was a little concerned about Jensen leaving with the other man after having been told about the nightmares. He gets up off of the couch and they carefully get Jensen lain out on it, covering him up with a blanket from the hall closet. They get his shoes off and get ready for bed. Julie has to be at work early as well and is slightly disoriented when her alarm goes off. She goes about getting ready, being careful not to wake the young man sleeping in their living room. She's making her coffee and decides to check on him when she discovers that her brother had come back out of his room at some time after retiring to bed. He is stretched out on the floor taking up the space that the coffee table usually has. She smiles when she realizes how much her brother has come to care about Jensen. When she first met Jensen and Jared, she never thought that her brother might actually earn a good friend out of it. She's still smiling as she slips out of the apartment to head to work.

* * *

Jared reluctantly pulls the door closed behind him after being persuaded to let Jensen stay. He's really unnerved to be away from the other man. What if he has another nightmare like the night before? They've been getting more frequent and more intense. Nearly every night for the last week he was been woken up by Jensen screaming. He really didn't want to leave the other man but Julie was adamant. He gets home and sets his alarm for work. He tosses and turns all night with worry. He doesn't think Jensen is ready for this. He just knows that he's going to get a phone call that Jensen's freaking out and needs Jared to come back. He waits all night and before he knows it, his alarm is going off and he doesn't think he got any sleep. He gets up and prepares for his double shift at the hospital. Meanwhile, across town are two young men still in the deep stages of slumber while the sun slowly rises. One of them slowly wakes and makes his way to the bathroom. He sees how early it still is and checks on the other on the couch before lying back down on his pallet of blankets and goes back to sleep. Several hours later, he's once again awake. He's watching the other man and smiles when green eyes open up and eventually land on his own blue. Jensen frowns when he sees Misha lying on the floor and needs several minutes to remember where he is. He also realizes that he has just had the best nights sleep he can remember since being discharged from the hospital. Once that occurs to him, he looks to Misha to find him grinning. 

"What?" 

The other man smirks at him and gives an exaggerated look to where the blanket has slid down Jensen's body. 

"Sleep well?" 

Jensen follows his gaze and scrambles to pull the blanket back over him, covering the tent in his pants. His face heats up and he refuses to make eye contact. His breathing picks up and he's about to make a dash to the bathroom when suddenly Misha bursts out laughing. Jensen startles at the abrupt sound. He finally looks over at the other man and frowns. Misha is finally catching his breath when he speaks. 

"I'm sorry! It's just, your first sleep over and you wake up with an erection! Is there something you want to share with the class?" 

Jensen blushes even deeper and runs to the bathroom, slamming the door behind him. He sits on the toilet as his manhood gradually softens again. He covers his face in his hands as tears start falling down his cheeks. He can't remember the last time he was this embarrassed. He thought he had finally found someone he could relate to and now he just wishes he could leave and forget he ever met the other man. He can still hear laughing when Misha knocks on the door. 

"Jensen? Come on, man, open up. You really think you're the first one this has happened to?" 

The voice is muffled when Jensen replies. 

"Go away and leave me alone you stupid ass!" 

Misha sighs and rolls his eyes. 

"You gonna stay in there all day? Julie told me that Jared has an extra long shift today so you're stuck with me until he comes by to pick you up." 

"Fuck off!" 

After several more minutes of trying to coax the other man out of the bathroom Misha gives up. 

"Fine, be that way. If you can't take a little humor then you're just a waste of space anyway. I'll be in the kitchen making breakfast if you decide to remove the stick from your ass and join me." 

It takes another hour but Jensen finally exits the bathroom. Misha makes multiple attempts to get Jensen to open up to him again but it seems the embarrassment of the morning was too much for the other man. 

"Jensen, I really am sorry. It just caught me off guard, alright? I never said I had good people skills." 

Jensen refuses to reply and they spend the rest of the day in awkward silence watching The Twilight Zone reruns. When Jared comes to pick him up later that evening, Jensen practically bolts out the door. 

* * *

Jared has to practically beg Jensen to go back to Julie's apartment after the sleep over. It becomes very tense for several weeks as Jensen's self esteem hits a new low. He has an extremely hard time trying to get passed what Misha had said about being a waste of space. It's exactly the kind of thing Tom would have said to him and even though he knows it's been longer, because of the amnesia he still feels like it just happened. It takes several more weeks before he allows himself to start feeling comfortable with the other man again and another couple after that when he finally is able to carry on the same kind of banter as previously. It's one of these visits that really brings everything out. As usual, Jared is talking to Julie in the kitchen while the other two watch TV in the living room. 

"Jared, it's completely normal for someone in your position to feel stressed. Jensen has been through a lot and it's just going to take time to get him back to what he was." 

"I know, I just...I get frustrated because it doesn't feel like he's moving forward at all. Sometimes the way he looks at me...it's like we take one step forward and two steps back. I can't help feeling like he should be making so much more progress than he has. I also think he's hiding something from me. He claims he hasn't remembered anything but his nightmares are just as bad as before and every day feels more tense than the one before. I'm trying to help him and I don't think he's letting me in." 

"I know it can be frustrating, but you have to remember that this is about Jensen. Everybody heals and processes differently. He's not just going to get better because you want him to. He needs time..." 

"I know that! I just feel that it's been too much time with too little result! I think he's lying to me about how far he's really come." 

"Well, if that's the case then maybe he needs more help than you can give him. Maybe you two need some time apart..." 

"Yeah, cause that worked out great the last time! Look how long it took for him to want to come back after what Misha said." 

"I'm not saying Jensen has to stay here. I'm merely suggesting that being babied is not helping him. Maybe he needs his own space, some time to himself to think things through. It might actually do him some good." 

Before Jared has a chance to reply they hear shouting coming from the other room. Concerned, they both run into the other room to see Jensen and Misha in a standoff facing each other. They are speechless at the volume that Jensen is exhibiting as he waves a DVD case around. 

“What the hell is wrong with you?! There is NO WAY I’m watching that crap!” 

Misha picks up an abandoned DVD from the couch. 

“It’s not crap! Anybody with two brain cells to rub together knows that THIS is the ultimate in entertainment!” 

Julie takes a few steps forward and tries to get them to calm down. 

“Hey! What is going on? What’s with all the yelling?” 

Jensen turns around to face her as he points an accusatory finger at Misha. 

“That bonehead thinks that Star Wars is better than Star Trek!” 

Misha chimes in before anything else can be said. 

“I’m not the BONEHEAD that thinks William Shatner is the finest thing to walk the earth!” 

Jensen turns back to Misha. 

“Hey! Young Shatner was damn sexy and you know it!” 

“That has nothing to do with how he is now! What was the last thing he was even in? A Priceline commercial?” 

“Well, at least he’s still acting! When’s the last time you saw James Earl Jones in ANYTHING?!” 

“That’s beside the point! Star Wars is far superior in every way...” 

Jensen interrupts his argument. 

“How do you figure? It’s so superior that it had to skip the first three episodes to get to anything good? For crying out loud, it starts with Episode Four! At least Star Trek was awesome from the beginning. I mean, come on! Captain Kirk is a badass!” 

Before Misha can reply Jared jumps in. 

“You guys are arguing over movies? Seriously? Jensen...I haven’t been able to get you to talk much louder than a whisper and you’re standing there yelling at Misha over whether Star Trek or Star Wars is better? You two are acting like a couple of little kids. Don't you think it's time to grow up?” 

Julie watches with curiosity. Even though Jared is not actually yelling at Jensen, the other man’s demeanor has changed dramatically since Jared started speaking. Jensen has turned his eyes down and is frowning at the floor. It appears that Misha notices this also and he steps slightly in front of Jensen. 

“You’re just jealous that you don’t have the intelligence to understand EITHER of these titles.” 

Jared doesn’t notice the effect he’s had on Jensen and focuses fully on the blue eyed man standing before him. 

“Excuse me? I have plenty intelligence. In case you forgot, I am a doctor.” 

Misha looks him up and down before scoffing at him. 

“That doesn’t make you any better than either of us. It sure as hell doesn’t mean you know anything about good television. Why don’t you two go back in the kitchen? We were doing just fine until you two barged in.” 

“Barged in? You two were yelling. We came to see what was wrong. We were worried about you two fighting. I mean, given your histories, you’re not exactly stable to begin with.” 

Jensen finally looks up at that. 

“Not stable? We may have raised our voices, but we were getting along fine. Did it ever occur to either of you that we could get along just fine if you didn’t keep sticking your noses in our business? You two can pretend all you want that you know what we’ve gone through but you have no idea and nothing pisses me off more than somebody acting like they're an expert on something like this and acting like you’re better than us.” 

Jared steps forward but stops when Jensen takes a step back. It’s in that moment that he realizes that there is a fear in the other man’s eyes that hasn’t been there since he found out about Tom. 

“Jensen...I don’t feel that way, at all. It’s just that you’re still recovering and you don’t even have all of your memories back. I don’t think it’s good for you to be getting into stupid arguments. You’re not going to get better if you keep ignoring your problems.” 

Jensen seems to deflate noticeably but it’s not until he speaks that Jared realizes it is not in agreement but in disappointment. 

“Maybe I was wrong about you, about us. I thought you were honestly trying to help me. I thought you were my friend, but all you see me as is a helpless person that needs fixing. You still see me as a victim.” 

“Jensen, no...that’s not...” 

Jensen holds his hand up so Jared will stop talking. 

“What is wrong with me might not be able to be fixed. I’m not a project that needs worked on. I might never get my memories back; I might never be who I used to be. Coming over here, hanging out with Misha made me realize something. Being with you makes me feel broken and like there’s something wrong with me because you keep reminding me. But when I’m here...I feel normal again. I get into stupid arguments about movies and he never once points out what’s wrong with me because he’s just as broken as I am. No, he never leaves the house but he earns an income on his computer. He’s not good with people and you berate him for it but it never occurs to either of you that this might just be who we are now. We may never be able to go back to who we were and it hurts that you two are constantly trying to fix us.” 

He turns and puts the DVD in his hands beside the TV. Misha can’t believe what he’s just heard and is speechless. They stand there a few minutes before Jensen grabs his coat and starts speaking again. 

“Jared, I don’t know if I should live with you anymore. I don’t think you’re really helping me. I think I need to find somewhere else to stay, at least for a while to clear my head.” 

Before anyone can reply Misha steps forward and takes the jacket out of his hands. 

“You can stay here.” 

Jensen is about to argue but Misha doesn’t give him the chance. 

“No. You obviously don’t feel comfortable there anymore and we have an extra bedroom here. I would certainly feel better having you here. Julie’s always complaining that I need to make friends.” 

He looks over at his sister as if to challenge her. She nods her head minutely. 

“Jensen, you are welcome to stay here for as long as you need.” 

Jared finally finds his voice. 

“Wait a minute! Don’t I have a say in this? I want what’s best for him and I don’t think that him moving is a good idea.” 

Julie looks over at Jared before replying. 

“Jared, I’m sorry but I think that Jensen is the best one to know what’s right for him. If he’s gotten to the point where he doesn’t think it’s doing him any good living with you, then maybe a little space apart can do him some good.” 

Jared is about to argue until he sees the pleading look on Jensen’s face. Deep down he knows that she’s right. The problem is that in the time that he and Jensen lived together, he’s gradually been falling for the other man. He just wishes he could go back and start all this over so that he and Jensen could get to know one another properly. He finally nods his head and they talk for a while before making Jensen’s sleeping arrangements.


	15. Chapter 15

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know it's been forever since I last updated and this isn't a very long update but it's what I have right now and hope it's good. I've been having such a hard time getting motivated but I still plan on finishing this story.

Jensen stays with Misha and Julie for another week spending individual time speaking to each of them about his past and his gradually resurfacing memories. He spends his time with Misha talking about his nightmares and with Julie he talks about the abuse he sustained at the hands of his ex. He can't find it in himself to discuss both topics with each of them but Julie assures him that as long as he feels comfortable continuing the way they are then that is what they will do. He feels so much lighter being able to speak to them both without having to go back to Jared's feeling unsure. At the end of the week he approaches Julie while she is making lunch.  
"Hey, Julie? Can I talk to you for a second?"  
She looks up and smiles at him before motioning to take a seat.  
"Of course, how are you feeling today?"  
They both sit down at the table.  
"I'm okay. I wanted to talk to you about me leaving."  
She frowns slightly before replying.  
"Leaving?"  
He clears his throat and looks down at his hands folded on the table.  
"Yeah. I mean, I appreciate everything you and Misha have done for me, but I think it might be a good idea for me to get out of your hair. I was talking to my friend Chris yesterday and he said I can move back in with him and Steve for a while until I'm ready to be on my own again. I do want to continue with our sessions, either with me coming back here for them or you could maybe come to Chris' place."  
They fall into silence as Julie thinks over what he has said. When she finally starts speaking he looks back up.  
"Jensen, I think that if you feel like you should go back to your friend's place for now then that is what you should do. I would be more than willing to come over for our sessions if that would be better for you. Have you talked to Misha about this?"  
He swallows and shakes his head minutely.  
"No. I wanted to talk to you first. Chris said he'd get the spare room ready for me again but I was worried how Misha would take it. We've kind of built up a routine and I was hoping you could kind of be a buffer when I tell him."  
"Of course. He may take it a little hard but maybe you going back to your friend's house will be enough incentive for him to leave the house to come see you."  
Jensen breathes a sigh of relief before getting up and going to the spare room to pack up some of the stuff he had brought with him. He's startled when he hears Misha speak behind him.  
"What are you doing, Jen?"  
Jensen turns around with a guilty look on his face. He takes a deep breath before speaking.  
"I want to talk to you about something. Can we go back out to where Julie is?"  
Misha frowns suspiciously before crossing his arms and leaning against the doorway.  
"You're leaving."  
Jensen starts nervously tugging on the end of his shirt.  
"I'm sorry. I just think that it'll be better for me. My friends are going to put me back up in their spare room until I can find work and get my own place."  
"Oh, so all of a sudden our hospitality isn't good enough for you?"  
"What?! No! Misha that's not it at all! I appreciate all you've done for me! I've remembered so much and I don't have as many nightmars anymore..."  
"Then what, Jensen? You're making such great improvement that you're just going to give up and go back?"  
Jensen frowns at his friend's attitude.  
"I'm not giving up. I'm going to continue my sessions with Julie and hopefully you if you'll let me. I just think that I need to work on figuring out how to do things on my own again."  
"Why would you need sessions with me? I'm not a therapist. Julie's the therapist. I'm just the schmuck that was there when you needed me and let you cry out your frustrations about Jared. I don't see how I could be of any further help to you."  
"Why are you being like this? You know I can't talk to Julie about my nightmares! I've tried. Look, I'm not expecting you to come over, I'll still come over here to talk."  
"What makes you think I want you to?"  
Jensen's words die on his lips. He stares at his friend for a moment before he can think of something to say.  
"You don't want to see me anymore?"  
The other man scoffs and pushes off the doorframe before walking out. Jensen follows behind to catch what he's saying.  
"Why would I want to? I mean all you ever do is cry about your ex mistreating you and Jared making you feel like crap and your friends trying to help you and all you ever do is push them away. Why would I want to be surrounded by that all the time?"  
He comes to a stop beside the kitchen where Julie is staring dumbfounded after hearing what was just said.  
"Misha!"  
He turns to glare at her.  
"What?! It's true and you know it! He has been nothing but a sniveling pathetic baby the whole time he has been here."  
"I am appalled at your behaviour! Jensen has been through a lot and don't stand there and pretend like you haven't enjoyed him being here! He has improved so much in the time he's been coming to see us and even in the week he has stayed here! If anyone is acting like a baby it's you because you know that with him leaving you'll be here alone through the day again and you've grown accustomed to having him here with you. You're afraid that with him leaving, you might actually have to leave the apartment, which by the way, would be good for you. The fact of the matter is that you're afraid that him getting better means you're going to get left behind because you refuse to even attempt to get better. He is trying to build his life back up and your attitude today only makes me believe you are trying to drag him back down so he doesn't leave."  
He continues to glare at her unable to think of anything to say because deep down he knows she's right. His constant refusal to see a therapist outside of his sister and flat out refusing to leave the apartment have left him comfortable in his isolation until meeting Jensen. He turns to leave the room.  
"Whatever. He can do what he wants, he's a grown ass man, see if I care."  
He storms out and slams his bedroom door. Julie turns to Jensen and sees he's on the verge of tears.  
"Jensen, he doesn't mean it. He's just upset and lashing out is the only way he knows how to express that."  
His voice wavers as a lone tear makes it's way down his face.  
"He's right though. That's all anyone ever thinks of me."  
Before she can reply, Jensen walks to the spare room and presses one of his most used speed dial keys into his cell phone. It picks up on the second ring.  
"Chris? I need you to come get me now, please?...No, I don't want to get into it on the phone but me and Misha just got into it. I just need to get out of here....Ok, thanks."  
He hangs up and sits on the bed trying to calm down. Julie approaches the open doorway but doesn't enter.  
"Jensen? Do you want to talk about it?"  
He wipes his face and shakes his head.  
"No. I just want to go. But, um, I don't think it's a good idea to have my sessions here. Do you think you could come to Chris' place when it's time?"  
She nods before answering.  
"Of course, whatever you need."  
He nods his thanks and finishes calming down before continuing to pack up his meager belongings. Twenty minutes later Chris is knocking on the door so Julie lets him in.  
"Hi, my name is Julie. You must be Chris."  
He nods and shakes her hand as he enters. She notices him look around the apartment with a look of determination and she knows it's not Jensen he's looking for. She sighs before drawing his attention back to her.  
"Misha's in his room. For what it's worth, I am so sorry. When he gets scared or upset he lashes out without thinking. He didn't mean what he said. He's grown so fond of Jensen over the weeks they've been talking and he's just upset that Jensen's leaving."  
"Yeah, well, no offense but I don't care what problems your brother has. I don't care what happened in his past that he obviously refuses to get over or try to get help for. Jen has been through hell that you can't even imagine. You only know what happened this last go around but he's been through so much more over the years that your therapy couldn't even touch the surface. Nobody hurts Jen and right now he's hurting pretty bad over whatever happened between him and your brother..."  
Just then Jensen makes an appearance after having heard his longtime friend. He approaches them about the time that Chris finishes his rant.  
"You're more than welcome at our place. I appreciate all you've done for Jen and as long as he wants to keep seeing you we'll gladly have you. But I want you to tell your brother that if he ever manages to pull his head out of his ass and actually leave the apartment to see Jen, there will be a punch waiting for him."  
Jensen interrupts then.  
"Chris, no, he's been through enough."  
He turns to the other man and replies.  
"I'm not saying I'm going to pummel him or anything. Just one hit and I'll be good. I don't know what he went through and frankly I don't care. What I do know is that he has no right to make you feel like shit just because he's being a little tit baby and refuses to get better."  
Jensen turns his eyes down and secretely appreciates the concern coming from his friend. He turns his eyes back up to Julie's.  
"I'm sorry. He just worries."  
She gives him a small smile and gently squeezes his shoulder.  
"I know and I'm glad. He's a good friend to have although I am a bit concerned about his quick temper."  
Her eyes flick quickly to the other man briefly. Jensen looks at Chris and grins before turning back to Julie.  
"He's okay. He's not a qsychopathic killer or anything."  
His friend scoffs and grumbles under his breath causing the other two to chuckle quietly.  
"Well, I can definitely tell you're comfortable with him so I can't be too concerned. Just let me know when you want me to come over and we'll pick up where we left off."  
"Okay, and thanks. You know, for everything."  
"Of course. Anything you need, just let me know. You have my number."  
She gives him a hug and shakes Chris' hand one final time before they leave.


	16. Chapter 16

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok, so I know it's been FOREVER since I updated and I am so sorry! I just recently found a better paying job and I was FINALLY able to buy a new laptop to update this. This chapter isn't as long as I had wanted it to be but I'm going to go ahead and post it just to get something on here while I continue working on the rest. Once I get another fair amount typed I'll update again. Once again, you guys are all so awesome and patient and I appreciate everyone who is sticking to this story even with as long as I'm taking on it! Also, I plan on getting this finished in the next chapter or two. The longer this gets I am having a harder time thinking of where this fic can go without it feeling like it's just dragging on. I really hope you like this chapter!

Jensen climbs into Christian’s truck while the other man puts Jensen’s bags into the back seat. Christian climbs behind the wheel and pulls onto the road. He reaches over and turns down the radio before speaking.

“Jen…”

Jensen interrupts before he can continue.

“Don’t, Chris. I don’t want to talk about it.”

Christian gives him a hard look before turning back to the road.

“Well that’s too damn bad. I ain’t leaving you alone until you talk to me. I want to know what happened to make you leave Jared’s place and move in with that therapist lady.”

Jensen sighs and is about to deflect until he sees the worry in his friend’s eyes. He turns towards his window and starts talking.

“I’ve…I’ve been remembering things…”

Christian looks over sharply at that.

“You got your memory back?”

Jensen glances up quickly before looking back down.

“No, not all of it. I just keep getting little snippets.”

He glances at Christian again before continuing, deciding to just tell him everything. If he doesn’t have Misha to talk to anymore he’s going to need somebody to talk about some of it with aside from Julie.

“Like, I remember him giving me trouble in the grocery store. Most of what I remember is how I felt, not necessarily the full memory itself. I remember the night we met, but not what happened. I remember feeling hurt, and rejection.”

It’s quiet in the cab for several minutes while he tries to find more words.

“I don’t remember much about my time with Tom this time but I remember feeling panic and every time Jared pops up in a memory I just feel confusion and hurt. Like…”

He has to swallow past the lump in his throat due to the emotion he’s feeling. He shrugs his shoulders before continuing, not even looking over at his friend.

“Why didn’t he want me, Chris? I mean, I don’t remember a whole lot yet, but did I do something so bad that night for him to just write me off? Something obviously happened for me to go back to Tom. It’s just so frustrating that I can’t remember. I want to know what I did wrong, what I keep doing wrong.”

He wipes his face at the onslaught of tears that he can’t hold back.

“I had to get out of there, Chris. Every time I look at Jared…especially after the nightmares. I’m sure that most of them aren’t real because the locations aren’t even real places. Like, I think I’m just subconsciously having my fears come to the forefront of my mind or something. But then there are others with Jared and Tom that seem so real. I had one that was in an apartment I didn’t remember but felt familiar and Jared was telling Tom that I was acting up or something. I don’t know what actually happened but the dream eventually warped and everything got dark. I was lying there on the floor and they both took turns kicking and hitting me and I kept screaming for help but no sound came out and I looked up and you were standing behind them with such a disappointed look on your face before shaking your head and leaving and…and I…I couldn’t…”

Christian quickly pulls over and throws the truck into park when Jensen starts hyperventilating. He removes both their seat belts and pulls Jensen to him to try to calm him down. Jensen grabs on like his life depends on it and fights to catch his breath as he sobs into his friend’s shirt.

“I remember Jared telling Tom that I towed his car! And Tom got so mad and he punished me because Jared’s a fucking doctor and should be given a free pass on shit because he’s so much better than me who is just a fucking tow truck driver who doesn’t deserve any better than to end up with a guy that beats me!”

His panic had quickly turned to anger and then into shock at the sudden memory that hit him like a freight train. They sit like that for another ten minutes before he calms down enough to think about what he just said. After several more minutes he sits back in shock and just stares at Christian.

“I…I don’t even know where that came from…I just…it just hit me after thinking about that nightmare…”

He trails off when he sees the rage on Christian’s face.

“Chris? What’s wrong, did I do something wrong?”

He starts to worry for a moment before his friend’s deadly calm voice cuts through his panic.

“No, Jen, YOU didn’t do anything wrong. Jared fucking tattled to Tom that you towed his damn car?”

Jensen looks down a moment and looks back up to answer.

“Yeah, I mean, I don’t remember where we were at or anything but I remember that part of the conversation.”

“Un-fucking-believable.”

Christian turns back to the steering wheel and puts the truck in drive before pulling away from the curb. Jensen quickly puts his belt back on and the truck picks up speed.

“Chris! Put your belt back on! What the hell?!”

Christian grumbles under his breath but puts his belt back on. He never answers Jensen and the rest of the ride is quiet. They get to the house and Christian grabs Jensen’s bags and heads into the house without another word. Jensen follows in confusion and Christian and Steve are already talking when he joins them in the kitchen.

“That fucking asshole egged him on!”

Christian is pacing the kitchen and smacks his hand down on the countertop. Steve is holding his hands up trying to calm the other man down. He looks to Jensen for clarification but the other man just shrugs. Steve turns back to the fuming man and begins talking to him.

“Chris! Would you calm down and tell me what’s going on. What happened?”

Christian stops pacing and looks at him.

“Jared fucking tattled like a little kid to Tom about Jen towing his car. He fucking got Jensen a beating over something that had nothing to do with Tom! Jen remembered it on the way here.”

Steve’s eyebrows go up and he looks at Jensen.

“You got your memory back?”

Jensen opens his mouth to respond but Christian replies.

“He doesn’t have all his memories back. He was just talking to me about his nightmares and it sparked a memory. Jared was fucking running to that dickhead with every confrontation he had with Jen!”

“Now, Chris we don’t know that. He may have just mentioned the tow in conversation…”

“Bullshit! Jen had a fucking dream about Jared telling Tom that they got into it at the store! I don’t believe for one damn minute that wasn’t a memory coming out!”

“Look, we don’t know anything for sure until the rest of Jensen’s memories come back. It could just be his insecurities coming out in dream form since he knows Jared and Tom went to college together…”

Jensen startles at that and finally speaks up.

“What? They knew each other before?”

The other men turn to him and Christian turns back to Steve with a ‘See?!’ look. Christian turns back to Jensen and answers.

“Yeah. They’ve known each other for years. They started hanging out again when you brought Tom to a barbecue here.”

Jensen finds a chair and plops down into it while that sinks in. He turns tear filled eyes to the other two men.

“I was staying with him, he was acting like my friend. My nightmares…I mean they freaked me out but I hoped they were just my fears coming out. Was he really helping give Tom fuel to punish me?”

Steve prevents Christian from replying by speaking first.

“We don’t know that, Jen. Jared probably didn’t know what was going on. You two didn’t get along when you first met and he was just probably venting…”

Jensen’s shaking his head.

“No, that can’t be right. In my one dream Jared and Tom were sitting on a couch and Jared just…straight up said it for no reason…”

“Yeah, but that was a dream.”

“It felt real.”

“A lot of dreams feel real, Jen, but that doesn’t mean they are.”

“Then how come every time I see Jared all I feel is hurt and…and rejection. I feel bad when I’m around him even when he isn’t doing anything. I don’t feel that way around that blonde guy and he was in several of my dreams too.”

Christian cuts in then.

“That’s because Chad was never hateful or anything towards you. I don’t know what all has happened between you and them but I don’t doubt for a second that your dreams are resurfacing memories.”

Before more can be said, the front door opens and closes and they hear Jared call out.

“Hey, guys? You home?”

He steps into the kitchen and is surprised to see Jensen there.

“Jensen? What are you doing here? Are you just visiting?”

A tear falls when Jensen looks at him and asks what he needs to know.

“Why didn’t you tell me you were friends with Tom?”

Jared stands speechless for a moment.

“Well, you were…ARE…still recovering. I was afraid of triggering you by talking about it.”

“Then why did you help him? I don’t remember much and I need to know…in the time I was with Tom…did you go to him and tell him about our confrontations?”

Jared looks at the other two men before turning back to Jensen.

“I swear, Jensen, I didn’t know he was beating you then!”

“But you did go to him?”

“I mean…we were just talking. I hadn’t seen him in forever since we had different majors. I was just venting.”

“But the grocery store…”

He lets it trail off when Jared’s face pales slightly.

“You remember that?”

Christian steps forward.

“Remember what, Jared? What happened at the grocery store?”

Jared starts fidgeting under Christian’s glare.

“Nothing! I mean, me and Jensen had kind of a disagreement, that’s all!”

Jensen rejoins the conversation and the dejected tone he uses cuts Jared deep.

“But you told Tom I was harassing you. And he got mad that I was bothering good people. And you were happy about it. You smirked at me.”

Jared swallows hard trying to figure out how to defuse the situation.

“Jensen, I swear to god, I didn’t know what he was doing to you! He was my friend for years and I hardly knew you! How was I supposed to know he was beating you?!”

Jensen frowns and raises his voice some.

“Your blonde friend knew and he didn’t know me at all!”

“I can’t be held responsible for what Tom did! Look, I admit what I did was wrong and I wish I could take it all back but I can’t! I am so sorry that I didn’t see it! I swear I will do my best to try to make it up to you! I know going to Tom was wrong but I just thought, you know, we were just being guys, ragging on each other.”

Suddenly Christian moves.

“Rag on this!”

He decks Jared hard enough that the large man goes down instantly. Christian hits him several times before Steve is able to pull him off. Jensen just sits there watching the whole thing. Steve stays between the other two men and Jared slowly gets to his feet, wiping blood off of his lip. Jensen gets up and starts walking towards the hall after making a wide berth around Jared.

“I’m going to my room. I want to be along for a while.”

As soon as he leaves the room Christian turns a hard glare back to Jared.

“Get your ass out of my house now or I swear to god I’ll beat you so bad your momma won’t be able to recognize you.”

Jared glances down the hall before turning and leaving the house. Christian is still glaring towards the front door when Steve grabs him an ice pack from the freezer. Christian mumbles a thanks as he takes it. They stand quietly a few moments before Steve starts speaking.

“Don’t you think you overreacted a bit?”

Christian levels his glare at the other man.

“Hell no! I swore that I would that I would protect him after everything that went down the last time! What the hell kind of friend am it?! He almost fucking died, Steve! So no! I don’t think I overreacted one damn bit! And I don’t want that asshole in this house…”

“Woah, now calm down. We both know that Jared didn’t intentionally hurt Jen…”

“The hell he didn’t! He might not have known Tom was going to beat his ass but the fact of saying it to Tom in front of Jen means he was trying to make Jen feel like shit! And don’t stand there and tell me otherwise!”

Steve’s retort dies and he doesn’t know how to respond to that. He just sighs and breaks eye contact before going about figuring what they should have for dinner.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'd also like to point out the update in the tags. When I first wrote this story it was mostly going to be a Jensen/Jared fic but it has mutated so much that I don't know if an actual relationship is going to be written between the two more than what was written so far. I apologize to those that were excited for that pairing but this fic is just getting so long that I'm worried if I try to force it the writing is going to suffer in favor of putting the pairing in there. I do have an idea for them but I don't think I'll get around to going into a long, detail filled relationship. I hope this doesn't deter too many of you from reading until the end.


End file.
